You’re heartbroken, nothing makes sense anymore, and all you do is cry and ask yourself what you did wrong. Of course the answers you seek will not come to you, so it’s best to stop beating yourself about it.
It may not be easy and hence you will need a group of friends to offer you support through this time. Not all friends will be willing to listen and not do anything about it. Each friend is different and hence will support you in her own way.
These are the five kinds of girlfriends you absolutely need to have pull you along
- The “Boyfriend” Girlfriend – This is your life partner, your best friend. This is the one person who is like the sister only that you’re not blood related. When you’re at your lowest she steps up to fill the void and vice versa. Every woman needs this friend in her life because she’s the one who helps you through all of your hardest times. And you will do the same for her because that’s what best friends do. She reminds you how strong, capable, amazing and resilient you are. Until you get to where you can believe that again, she’s there to prop you up, bring you bottles of wine, hug you, take you out and make you laugh.
- The “Hater” Girlfriend – This is a very close friend, who isn’t afraid to tell you the truth, she’s the one who reminds you why you broke up with your man in the first place. She’s there to act as the harsh one, the one who satisfies the petty desires you’re ashamed to admit to anyone else. She hates him so you don’t have to hold onto those ugly feelings in your heart. This friend is invaluable, as she reminds you of his lame qualities when all you can remember are the great times you shared. She may not take you over to the dark side, but she provides you with some much-needed levity.
- The Voice of Wisdom – This is usually a friend with some age and/or extensive relationship experience on you. She knows all breakups are different. She knows you don’t want to hear, “You’re going to be okay,” or “You should be thankful” from anyone. This friend offers constructive advice and ways to help you grow and heal. She draws your attention away from him and towards yourself.
However, her ways are subtle. If she shoves the medicine down your throat, you’ll run and never look back. She is spiritual, self-exploratory and has a wealth of knowledge from her own tough past to share. Listen and take it for what it is. There will no judgment or preaching, simply soul sharing.
- The Fun-Time Girl – This is the friend who will take you out to dance, drink and cry out your feelings in the club. It doesn’t matter if you are 30 or 40 years. Her purpose is so that you can live the house and seek adventures to distract your mind. You don’t need the hangovers because they don’t make you feel any better. You need to know the person you just lost is not the only playmate and companion you have.
- The Eternal Optimist – We all need hope even when all odds are against us. There should always be a kind-hearted friend in your circle who can provide grounded optimism and cautious hope. Yes, it’s true you never know what life will bring. Even in the most hopeless of situations, these thoughts can buoy you along, until you are far away enough from the situation to see clearly again. She offers objective enthusiasm and balanced input, always making you feel like you did the best you could, and it’s no one’s fault. Somehow, you will leave the conversation feeling justified, uplifted and comforted, even if only temporarily. Keep this one close by; you’re going to need her.
Friends serve different purposes in life, so keep in mind they can never be too many.