Tips On How To Be A Good Listener

Many couples complain about their partners not listening to them. They say that they are often ignored or whatever they say isn’t taken into consideration. Listening isn’t as hard as people make it seem.. Here are afew tips on how to be a good listener to your partner.

1. Be responsive to each other’s talk: Simply nod your head, words like ‘uh huh’ and ‘that makes sense’ would work in this case. This your ill make your partner feel better since they know that you’re acknowledging them. 

2. Avoid multi-tasking: Divided attention never works in communication because you’ll never be able to focus on either of them well. If you can’t do that excuse your partner and focus one, then when you are done, put your attention back on them.

3. Simply listen, clear your mind of any agenda: During conflict, couples listen to each other with the intent to reply not to really understand. Always do one thing in this case – listen.

4. Listen to learn: Couples don’t to learn, they listen to point out mistakes. When you listen to learn, you understand many things about your partner including body language and moods.

Bruce Muzik 

Could Your Boyfriend Pass These 5 Tests?

If you’re not sure your new guy is going to be a keeper, this test will apparently help you know if he is boyfriend-material, because how else will you know it’s the real deal or not?

Here are five tests every girlfriend should give her boyfriend.

1. The Mom Test. You can substitute your mom with whoever the most important person in your life happens to be. After all, this test is all about taking your new man back to meet a person who has known you forever – and whom you know is going to be there for the rest of your days. If your new boyfriend doesn’t mesh well with your closest family and friends without an understandable reason, then it might be time to rethink things. If he fails, don’t be afraid to move on to the next one.

2. The Vacation Test. There are a lot of things that happen on vacation that will put your relationship to the test. Do you both work well as a team while you’re lost? When you get into an inevitable argument will you both deal with it well with communication? How do you both deal with it money together? If you end up feeling more stressed than happy once the vacation is done, then he might not be the one for you.

3. The Girl’s Night Test. At the start of every relationship, couples tend to be inseparable. But there comes a time where you settle down and try to find time for your friends. When you have your first girl’s night, that’s when you’ll get a good idea how secure your boyfriend is. Does he constantly try to find out what you’re up to as if he doesn’t trust you? Does he try to talk you out of going out? Does he try to ruin your night by picking a fight? These are all red flags saying you need to get out STAT!

4. The Taste Test. It’s fine to have a boyfriend who has different taste in music, TV shows, and his choice of pastimes – that makes things more interesting! What’s not okay if your boyfriend insists his taste is better and completely overrides all of your opinions. A good relationship will make room for the things each of you enjoy equally. If he has problems compromising, he definitely fails.

5. The Living Together Test. If you’re against moving in together, perhaps you can do a stay-cation instead. After all, there are a lot of things you learn about each other when you share the same living quarters for an extended period of time. Which chores is your boyfriend good at? Is he the type that needs to be reminded to do them? Are there any weird habits he’s had that you’ve overlooked? Living together will definitely answer these, and you’ll learn if he is committing any huge deal breakers.

See more at: thebolde


Want To Flirt? Here’s How To Turn It Up

Do you know how to flirt? Or would you like to turn up your flirting skills? Flirting is a way of communication to members of the opposite sex, however if not done correctly it will send the wrong message.

There are five ways of flirting,  Playful, Physical, Polite, Sincere, and Traditional. We all have all the five styles, but use only one or two dominant ones. Many people miss noticing when others are flirting with them due to miscommunication, playing hard to get and being “indirect”. Getting your signals mixed could often land you in awkward situations as you misinterprete someone who’s interested as not interested and vice versa.

For you to be good at flirting you need to be able to communicate clearly your interest or disinterest to someone and you also need to be able to read the same vibe from others. Here’s how to up your flirting skills and turn it up:

1) Practice feeling interested – Flirting is a skill that you either have or you don’t there’s no in between. Many people who know how to flirt failed at their previous attempts before they got it right. You can “feel interested” by accepting and being aware of feeling attracted or interested in someone and letting it affect how you act. Try this: let yourself feel interested in someone you don’t know and probably won’t see again. When you interact with an attractive cashier, barman, waiter, or even conductor take a moment and pause. Smile to yourself, and recognize that you are attracted to them. Then, for the rest of your meal, sale, or interaction, keep that recognition in your head. Embrace feeling interested.

2) Adopt an open mindset – Accept the possibility that someone you know is interested in you. Try imagining they are really interested in you. Accept that interest as if it were completely true. Be open to it. The consequences of this activity should be revelatory. How does that knowledge change you? What does it feel like to believe it? Once you can convince yourself through imagining their interest, you will be much more alert to what it feels like when it actually happens. It might have the happy consequence of finding a partner whose flirting style is more reserved, that is, someone who is switched off.

3) Watch carefully – Start being a people watcher. Notice how women flirt with men. Notice how men flirt with women. Watch couples interact at a bar and try to guess if they are on a first date or already in a relationship. Practice being more aware of flirting in general. People who are switched off lack awareness. They often complain that they are oblivious to the interest of others. By noticing it more in others, you will be less oblivious when it happens to you.


Are You Shy? Here’s How To Handle A Date?

Shy guys usually have trouble dating because of their lack of confidence when it comes to approaching a woman. It is not impossible for a shy guy to get a woman for himself, all it takes is a little patience just as it does for a “normal” guy. Here are a few tips:

Choose wisely – Besides the girl, you need to choose a good place where you would like to take her. Ensure it is a familiar and comfortable setting that will help you be relaxed and more focused. You don’t want to go to a place where the setting is too formal that you cannot be yourself around her.

Take conversation backups – It is okay if you find yourself out of words or conversation ideas. That happens with most introverted people. So you can think of various topics to talk about and work around them. Just make sure she also like the topics.

Drink a little – We all know that drinking a little can make things more relaxed and more open. So go for a couple of drinks, and only as much as you can sincerely handle. Go for something light which will bring the best out of you. Avoid getting drunk or tipsy.

Take it easy – And the most important tip is to take it really easy. Don’t rush into anything, let the conversation flow and don’t force her to think along your lines.


Smart Tips On Handling A Date

When you are set to go out on a date especially the first one, it’s important to plan beforehand to ensure that everything goes as smoothly as possible. Pay attention to detail to avoid mishaps and embarrassments. Here are afew tips to go by

Plan activities – Instead of just thinking about the dinner, how about you think past that? You can do a movie later or attend a concert or even take a walk together. That way there will still be plenty of things to talk about.

Make a reservation – Having a reservation helps avoid the last minute rush of looking for a suitable restaurant and running up and down. Call in advance and have a place set up for you early so that you may have sufficient time to prepare well.

Choose an appropriate outfit – Depending on where you are going, it’s important to dress the part. You cannot wear a sun dress to a cocktail party or a suit to the beach. You need to look the part so dress well and leave an impression on your date that you took time to get ready for them.

Tips For A Successful Marriage

Actor/Singer Tyrese and Reverend Run who co-authored the book Manology that is a relationship guide which gives lessons for different perspectives, have a show that is about matters relationship from a male perspective. One from a single man’s (Tyrese) view another from a married man and preacher’s (Rev. Run ) view.

The two tackle different issues and give advice to both women and men on some of the things that they do wrong and how to make them right. The two gave tips on how to have a successful marriage.

Know the person – Tyrese said that it is important to know whoever you intend to marry because love is just not enough. Once people get married they realize that they do not know who they are married to and begin to feel like they married a stranger. You may know this person by talking to them and asking them questions, chilling with their friends, family etc.

Marriage Mentors – Before marriage, it it important to find a married couple that could mentor you through the process. Allow them to share their wisdom on the roles played by wives and husbands and the challenges that they face together.

Conflict Resolution – Conflict is one thing no one can avoid, whether in marriage, work or school as it is part of life. Managing conflict is what is important. Rev Run says that you have to learn how to argue without hitting below the belt. It will take time before you can get to a point where you argue without taking time out because you will have to learn how to forgive. It should be a priority.

Fading sparks – Sparks fade as time goes by and it’s got nothing to do with any of you. But as a couple it’s important to constantly work on your relationship, intimately, emotionally and spiritually. If you ignore these things, they might end up killing your relationship.

Marriage Vows – Take your wedding vows seriously. Don’t gloss over them but take time to understand them and discuss how those vows will play-out in your marriage.

Understand your role – Ladies when you are at home you are not the CEO that you are at work. When you get home you are a wife so don’t be barking orders around. Men, when you get home you are the husband not the boss and your wife is not your P.A.


How To Move On From A Heartbreak

Breakups are not the easiest things to deal with. The pain and heartache associated with it is enough to drive one insane. Infact science has proven that hearbreak is also physical pain that takes time to heal depending on how you deal with it. Once you have dealt with the end of a relationship, one has to move on with life. It is not hard but it’s possible.

Here are afew tips:

1. Your partner is the same person The one thing about breakups is that people often blame themselves and question why or how they may have caused the issue. The one thing you will need to understand is that you are responsible for yourself only. Your ex will remain the same person they were unless they want to change but that is something you cannot do.

2. Cut contact- You need to give yourself a break from your ex by all means. No calls , texts, facebook, DM, emails etc. Cut contact and give yourself time to heal. You may also avoid places where you are bound to find them hanging out.

3. Accept and move on – It has happened there is only so much that you can do about it. Accept that there is life after this person and that you can do better. Everyone deserves to be loved and cared for well and so do you. Do not try to keep mending broken pieces because they will hurt you more.

Simple Tips To Win Your EX Back

People fall inlove, date and get serious but sometimes things don’t go as planned and they end up separating. In some cases especially if you had mutual friends you are bound to meet each other every so often. This may rekindle old feelings and one may want to act on them by reigniting an old flame.

If you want to get back with an ex, here are afew tips that you need to be able to achieve this.

Plan Formulate a plan in your mind that will help you achieve this. Consider things that they like/dislike in order to avoid petty issues that may arise. You will also need to confirm whether they are single before you initiate contact.

Chat them up – Begin to get into contact but in a friendly manner and establish a rapport with them first. Time changes people so take it as a new discovery journey.

No sex – No matter how good they are in bed, as tempting as it is don’t walk down that road. It will make things complicated for no reason.

Take your time Its not automatic that your ex will be receptive of you especially if you had a nasty breakup. Allow them to slide back into your life at their pace, don’t force your agenda. Once you confirm that you are on the same page them tell them what you want.

Meet up If you want something you go and get it. Do coffee, lunch, go to a concert and make new memories together. Its rewritting a new script for your lives again.

Once everything works out then start afresh, deal with your past demons and leave them there.

Three Major Tips For Picking Your Bridesmaids

When planning your wedding, it’s a tough task going through the list of close friends and family to choose for your bridal team. Unless you intend to have an entire football team in tow, you will need to narrow down to just a few girls.

It’s not easy, but here are tips to help you simplify a task that has made many lose friends.

1. Use the elevator/deserted island trick– If you were stuck on an island or an elevator at Nyayo House, no air-con, no network , nothing. You will most definitely be anxious, scared, irritated among other things. If you were to name three people at the top of your head who would come to your rescue without thinking much, who would they be?

2. Simply ask – Unless you ask them you will never know their response. But if you are conflicted by worries about them not talking to you after, you having been on her line-up, her having helped you plan the wedding etc, then it’s probably not a very good idea. You don’t owe anyone any favors and if you feel like you do then that is not the right person.

3. Discuss with your future spouse – You have to have the same number of maids/groomsmen. Ask them which number they want and how comfortable the both of you will be with the number. Whichever number you both choose, go with it; if anything it may simplify work for you.

3 Skills That Will Make You Better At Attracting The Right Partner

Have you ever wondered what kind of skills we should apply in our everyday affairs and especially dating?

Well wonder no more. This is what you can do as you go about exploring a new relationship

1. Read your date’s clues

When you go out with someone you just met and really like, you tend to focus on yourself and how nervous you feel. You may worry whether or not you’ll be asked on another date, or about how to ensure your date doesn’t contact you again. Either way, you are not fully present in the moment. You’re not being mindful.

Do you pay attention to people’s faces, eye movements, vocal patterns, gestures, posture, and other nonverbal clues about who that person really is? It all helps form your perception of the other person. To be a Sherlock, you need to learn to read people.

For starters, try reminding yourself before you go on a date to observe these kinds of clues. And keep doing it periodically throughout the date. Now, you might be thinking, “Not one more thing to remember! That will just make me more nervous.” But the paradox here is that focusing mindful attention on another person can actually have a calming effect.

2. Relax yourself

Observe your own nervous system. Be as cool as the proverbial cucumber. To find this sort of stillness yourself, scan your body for muscle tension. Notice where you are tight, and breathe into those areas to relax them.

You can begin to do this on your drive (or walk or cab ride) to meet your date. If you are driving, for example, focus on the act of driving itself. Feel your hands on the wheel, your foot on the pedal, your legs on the car seat. Wherever you notice tension, mindfully release it.

When you meet your date, periodically redirect your attention to relaxing yourself. The trick is to do this without making it visible to your date, as though you were practicing an exercise. See if you can let it be natural.

Relaxing yourself while also observing your date’s clues might take practice.

3. Put together the clues you find

All this effort is ultimately only worth it if you can use what you discover to help you find and create the relationship you want. You have to put the clues together in a meaningful way. Obviously, this will take practice. But a lot of it is common sense.

For example, if you observe that your date doesn’t meet your gaze, you can deduce something is preventing closeness between you. This clue alone may be enough to halt the date, or at least prevent future ones. Or it may be information you can combine with other clues — such as blushing or sweaty hands — that tell you your date is overly nervous.

That fact by itself may not be reason to break things off with an otherwise attractive date. In that case, use the clues to gently ask your date about his or her shyness. See if the problem has a solution. In this way, you can potentially save a relationship that would crash and burn if you didn’t use your Sherlocking abilities.


Study: Tips For Being Happy

Everyone craves happiness; it’s the one thing that seems elusive to many people yet it also happens to be the easiest to achieve. If anything, the choice to be happy is simply one that we can make ourselves yet we end up depending on others to do it for us.

According to various studies, happiness isn’t as hard to get as it seems. Here’s how to go about it:

Watch less TV: Unhappy people spend more time watching TV, according to a study in the Social Indicators Research journal. There is a lot more to life than being a potato couch. Go take a walk, swim, dance, drive etc. There is a lot to see and people to meet.

Get older: If you’re dreading the white hairs and health drawbacks of aging, know that there’s a silver lining. More studies are showing that happiness increases after middle age. It seems the older you get the happier you become, so don’t sweat it.

Plan a vacation: Researchers found that it’s the planning for a vacation and not necessarily the actual trip itself that increases happiness in people. Perhaps the anticipation of getting away from the daily grind causes us to grin more than when we’re actually on the beach without a worry in sight. Thinking of that random Mombasa plot? Do it ..go walk in the beach and enjoy those mabuyus and Bhajias.

Change it up: Even if you’re doing something that makes you happy, the joy may wear off if it becomes routine. Change things every once in a while, routine is boring, be spontaneous you will discover plenty of new things.

Be around happy people: Happiness is apparently infectious according to a study in the British journal BMJ, so surround yourself with positive people. That however doesn’t mean you should break up with your Debbie Downer friends, say the researchers. You can help spread happiness by doing things to improve their lives. Share the joy, spread the love.

Enjoy nature: Viewing greenery gives your brain a mental break. Go to the National park, Nairobi safari walk or even Uhuru park for a walk.

Do cultural activities: Go to the museum/Bomas of Kenya and learn about different cultures. A study in the Journal of Epidemiology and Community Health found that men who take part in cultural activities are more happy and satisfied than those who don’t.

Own pets: A furry friend will increase your self-esteem, feeling of belonging, and meaning of your existence, says a study in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. Quite a tall order for such compact creatures.

Do charity work and volunteer: Doing good for society has its perks. People who give away their money to charity or volunteer tend to be more satisfied, according to a study published in the journal Science.


Simple Skin Hacks Every Woman Needs

Every woman wants to have beautiful skin and hence the millions that are running cosmetics industries that produce various products to cater for the masses. Skincare doesn’t have to be an expensive affair and hence simple home care hacks came up. If you want to have good skin, here are a few tips:

Adult acne is very much prevalent and more common that you imagine. If you get a bad breakout, it is best to visit a dermatologist but if the pimples come now and then, zap them if you’re really desperate, dab some toothpaste on the zit overnight and see it dry up by morning.

Use petroleum jelly on your elbows and heels – every night before you go to bed. This will soften your heels and lighten the dark patches on your elbows.

Instead of using a face scrub with chemicals –
make your own homemade one with sugar and honey. Take a teaspoon of honey and mix two tablespoons of sugar. Use this as a natural face scrub twice a week and see how your skin glows.

Stick to washing your face twice a day – Washing it multiple times will only strip itof moisture and essential oils, leaving it dry and prone to flakiness.

Use baby lotion to cleanse your skin every day – This is gentle enough for your face and will leave it soft and supple.

While applying sunscreen on your face and arms/ legs is a must, don’t forget your decolletage. Sun damage can make this area look saggy and cause wrinkles, not to mention dark spots.


Divorce Tricks That Will Help You Save Time And Money

Marriage is a beautiful thing and though sometimes it may not work for you it works out for others. That being said, it’s important to know that termination of a marriage, is not the end of life granted it may be hard to deal with, taking into account things such as the legal battles that include sharing of property, and agreeing on the children’s custody.

It doesn’t always have to be dramatic, so here are tips for keeping the legal aspects of your divorce as simple as possible, thus saving you time and money as written by James Sexton for the Huffingtonpost.

Write down your goals – Not only does writing down your goals help you figure out what you really want and need out of this process, it also is there as a reminder in case you lose your bearings. Everyone gets emotional during a divorce, at some point. Having concrete goals helps you focus. There are three things you should identify at the start of a divorce: what you need, what you want and what you’re entitled to. (It’s worth noting that that second thing is typically informed by that third thing).

Familiarize yourself with the family finances – One of the biggest shocks for many people, male and female spouses alike, is how little we pay attention to the flow of incomings and outgoings. Spend a week or more using your spare time to go over your bank statements, bills, taxes, insurance policies, and so on. Have all the documents on hand in case we need them, and make copies of the crucial stuff.

Review everything your spouse reports – Even with the best of intentions, mistakes can be made . People also lie like crazy sometimes when they’re getting divorced. Review everything your spouse reports to make sure your reports line up. The last thing you need is a surprise because it may cost you a lot.

Close joint accounts – Any purchases made from joint accounts can create problems during the divorce, and you could end up paying for stuff you didn’t buy or spending tons of money in legal fees trying to “sort out” what was pre-divorce and what was post-divorce.  Keep it simple. Close the joint accounts. . NOTE, however, that you should either: (A) let your spouse know you’re doing this before you do it (so they don’t panic and think you’re raiding the piggy bank; or (B) take only HALF of the money in the account and let your spouse know that you’ve left the remaining half in there for his or her sole and separate use.

Figure out how much money you need – What is the amount of money that will allow you to live comfortably until and through your retirement, taking into account your lifestyle and your existing annual income? This is your goal going into the divorce.

Record all your expenses – Collect all the records you have from the past year or two, and then keep a record of everything you spend from now until the divorce is finalized. This will help answer any questions that may come up about expenses.

Use your lawyer for legal advice not personal advice – Your divorce attorney is likely not the best person to be providing emotional support. Frankly, they are not trained for it and probably have a higher rate-per-hour than many people who ARE trained for it. If you need someone to talk to about the big stuff, there is zero shame in getting therapist .

Flirting Mistakes Women Make

Flirting is a harmless way of showing someone you like them but you should be careful how you go about it. There are things that may seem harmless to you but yet could be a definite turn off to the other person. Here’s a list of some of them

Talking about other people who like you – Well, frankly speaking, it`s all about me. Don’t make this fatal mistake. When you tell a guy that he’s the winner among all the other guys who also like you, he may think something like “You may count for our friendship and nothing more. You see, I already have a “partner’s list” to choose from.” He may think you are a light-headed girl who’s not interested in long-term relationships.

Over confidence – When flirting with a shy guy, don’t be too confident and don’t try to show that you don’t have any insecurities. When flirting with a confident guy, though, don’t be too mean. Many girls tend to be mean with confident guys because they think it can help them look more confident too. In fact, this type of behavior can scare any guy away.

Laughing all the time –  Well, laughing at his jokes is a must, but don`t go too far. Don’t start giggling every time he tells a joke, especially if you don`t really find it funny, because it`ll look unnatural and he will understand that you actually don’t like it.

Drinking too much –  Some little alcohol will not spoil your date. What’s more, it can make you feel relaxed and even more confident. However, moderation is always important. You should avoid getting drunk when flirting, as you wouldn’t like him to see you rolling on the floor, moaning and crying. Modern guys are looking for the girls with no bad habits like drinking or smoking.

Lying – Lying is awful and can ruin any type of relationship. Tracing whom you lied to and what you lied about in order not to get caught is a heavy burden. Moreover, it’s a bad idea to start your relationship with a lie. If you want your crush to love you, not your lie, it’s better to tell the truth only. No sweet little lies!

Being too cold – Women love drama and like to test men. I used to follow the strategy “I don’t care about you, so love me” and I must confess that it was a mistake. When you make a man think that you don’t like him just to find out if he’s straightforward enough to deserve your love, it may bring the desirable result. But think twice, would you like to be in a relationship where you’re loved only when you don’t like your partner?

-J.houston/ Womanitely

6 Creative Ways To Meet ‘The One’ In 2016

Everyone is excited about the New Year. And one thing on the mind of most singles is meeting and connecting with their potential mate.

Many singles are tired of going out because they run into the same people which makes the pickings very slim.  However, it’s a new year and its time for a fresh start. The best way to find a fresh pool of potential candidates is by fishing in a different pond.

Judi Mason is an Empowerment Strategist who uses multiple platforms to help individuals be empowered. Here are her 6 ways to meet a new group of singles:

Get out:

Get out from behind your computer. Get out of your house. Get out of your car. Put down your phone and connect with real people.  Meeting people online is great but while you are Facetiming someone in Singapore, there are a lot of real live potential candidates in your city.

Change your mindset:

View people you meet as a connection and not necessarily “the one”. The person you meet today might be a connection to someone you would like to meet. When you meet people relax and enjoy yourself.

While you are being your wonderful charming self, the people you are interacting with might say, “You would be perfect for my friend”.  If by chance you and the friend don’t hit it off, you have one more ally. Take the pressure off. Relax. Enjoy yourself and allow the beautiful person you are to shine through.

Change your mindset from “I’ve got to meet the one” to “I am going to have a good time.” You will see a difference in who you attract and your emotional well-being.

Switch up your go to spot:

Don’t go to the normal single hangouts, instead visit unlikely places. For instance, go to the museum, visit tourist spots, etc. You never know what local resident might be taking his or her friends on the tour of the city.

Start a singles club:

Connect with old friends, co-workers, colleagues ask if they know of singles who are interested in connecting with other singles. Have your friends do the same. Host a mix and mingle for everyone to meet. You might meet a potential mate and possibly make a new friend.

Date more:

Mr. Right does not exist. Stop instantly saying no when someone with “potential” ask you out on a date. You never know you might have a good time. And if you don’t connect he or she might have a friend to introduce you to. Trust me, it happens.

Get active:

Volunteer for a political campaign or non-profit. Join a professional organizations for your industry. This is a great way to meet other like-minded individuals.

The following are just suggestions, but I think that you get the idea. If you want something different you have to do something different.

This year take the pressure off of meeting “the one” and choose to enjoy the journey. Start 2016 on a mission to live your life to the fullest and to have fun along the way. With an open mind and a clean slate, you might be surprised who you meet.


How To Get Over Someone You Are Hung On

We may have found love from the best man/woman on earth who made us feel alive like no one else ever did. This person changed our world and made us see things in such a different light. Things happen and we break up, we try as much as we can to move on but it seems impossible. It’s true that our past stays with us in one way or another, but if we wish to one day feel alive again, we must shift our focus to the future. We must focus on action.

Here are some tips to help you move on:

Give it time – Time does heal all wounds. How much time however, depends on the individual. If this is someone you never imagined yourself moving on from, then you’re probably going to need more time than you imagine. Don’t rush it. Don’t rush moving on. Don’t rush into another relationship. Just slow down a bit, and let time pass on by for a moment. Breathe.

Understand why you two aren’t going to work out and get closure – Closure is understanding why you two aren’t going to work. Regardless of whether you were dumped or were the one doing the dumping, if you’re still hung up on this person, then you’re going to need to do some reasoning with yourself. He’s bad for you. You’re bad for each other. You missed your chance. The timing was just never right. Or maybe, you just don’t have it in you to keep on trying. Find the reason you need to let go, and hang on to that instead.

Shift your mental focus from him or her and onto yourself – Minds drift, so we need to be sure to catch them and recenter our focus. Remember that you are the most important person in your life. That’s the way it was since the day you were born, and that’s the way it’s going to be until the day you die.

This doesn’t mean you can’t find someone in your life who’s equally as important, but it does mean you need to let go of those that are hurting. Get out of your head for a little bit. Don’t do something stupid, but do something. Don’t let your thoughts drown you; focus on the physical world.

When you begin to lose hope, focus on the numbers of it all – While time does heal all wounds, it can also form new ones. Letting go of someone who meant the world to you isn’t a simple task. Getting yourself to the point where you’re ready to seriously date other people is difficult. But what’s even more difficult is realizing that finding someone worthwhile isn’t as easy as you expected it to be.

If your ex was an amazing person, you’re not going to be capable of settling for less. You’ll need time and luck to meet another great candidate. The loneliness will surely kick in, but just remember that while there are billions of people on this planet, there are tens of thousands of potential candidates for the average individual. The odds aren’t too bad if you’ve managed to take great care of yourself since you broke up.

Understand that it’s all part of the learning experience – To live is to learn, so as long as you’re doing that, you’re doing a good job. You need to try and find some comfort in that. Be your story’s superhero. Be your champion. Do the things you want to do, and live life the way you want to live it. In the end, it’s up to us to make something both of ourselves and of our lives.

Give time, time so that it may work. Healing takes time so you should allow it to happen at its own pace. Don’t rush it.


Top Weight Management Tricks

One of the top New Year resolutions many people have made is to lose weight, become fit, watch what they eat, travel more etc. While losing weight is an uphill task, gaining it seems to be very easy especially because many don’t watch their food. In case you are fit and want to maintain your weight and fitness, here are some tips:

Listen to your appetite – Avoid sticking to a strict food clock. If you feel hungry, go treat yourself to some good, filling food instead of relying on low calorie snack that does not have any protein or fibre to fill you up.

Rescue yourself with water – Never misunderstand-thirst as hunger. Most of the times, we tend to hog into basket fulls of food, when all our body needs is water. Thus, understand your body well, and keep on sipping water at regular intervals to escape from the monster, that is, weight gain.

Take a closer look at your portion size – If you are visiting some city, you cannot return without tasting that specific city’s delicacy. Go take the full advantage of your tour and try anything and everything, but the key is don’t over indulge.

Learn to prioritize and don’t live a sedentary life – The world appears to be one big buffet of temptations, if weight management and health are important to you, remind yourself of that ultimate goal before you go at a meal. Prioritize other things like meeting new people, exploring the city, etc, rather than hogging every now and then.

Besides, you can also make a deal with yourself to take take the stairs instead of the elevator or walk short distances rather than hoping into a car.

Watch out for energy dense foods – You don’t have to be a dietitian to know that a big slice of dense cake or greasy burger is filled with empty calories and a lack of nutrients. The food you choose should not be bang for your buck always. Never see how large a volume of food you will get for the money you spent. Instead, classify as how full you will feel versus amount of calories consumed. Learn to replace large calorie count consumption with high nutrients content like fibre, protein and healthy fats.

Watch your alcohol – When it comes to alcohol consumption, control yourself. One or two drinks once in a while is cool rather than making it a daily or weekly event. This once in a while strategy will amaze you by instantaneously flattening your belly.

Separate emotions from hunger  Never turn to food for comfort, when you feel restless or low. Instead, when you feel low, go for a walk, listen to some music or read some interesting facts. Either way, if you want to return home without having added kilos then separate your travelling blues from hunger eating.

Don’t feel pressured by others – Often in social situations, we are pressured into eating and drinking based on other people’s preferences. Live your own way to travel and eat healthy. Either way, figure out your style of eating, and then try and set up a plan to work with it.