5 painful signs you’re in a one sided relationship


The big problem of a one-sided relationship is that the person who is more committed in the relationship becomes less satisfied over time due to their needs not being met.

Here’s how to tell if you’re putting in too much effort

Simple survival tips for Monday

1. They constantly bail on you
Do you find yourself making plans for dinner or lunch and then at the last minute, they don’t show up?

2. Your priorities are different from theirs

If the only way you can see them is if you fit around their schedule, then you might in a one-sided relationship.

Should you also have to travel long distances to see him, yet he never sacrifices to come to you, then it’s one sided.

How to end a terrible date 

3. They never return the favor

Some people take more than they give, and it’s a sign you’re in a one-sided relationship.

4. You apologize when you shouldn’t have to

Do you apologize for things that aren’t even caused by you or for simply being yourself? If your partner is making you feel bad and putting you down for simply being you, then that’s a bad sign that they’re too controlling over your life.



Also read more here

British singer Adele’s new celebrity boyfriend sparks hilarious reactions


Six months on from her marriage split, superstar Adele is back on the dating scene and reportedly seeing another of music’s hottest acts.

The internet is awash with rumors that British singer Adele is dating a British/Nigerian singer called Skepta.

Adelle split from her husband Simon in April and finalized her divorce in September.

Skepta was rumored to be in a relationship with model Naomi Campbell last year.


View this post on Instagram

Tottenham Boy ❤️ #konnichiwa

A post shared by Adele (@adele) on

‘We created the best of moments together’ – Chanty to Eric Omondi


Eric Omondi and his long time girlfriend Miss Chanty have been serving us relationship goals for the longest time. But things took a turn on Tuesday May 22nd, when he announced on social media that they had broken up.

While many fans didn’t want to believe it as he has pulled many publicity stunts before, it may be a reality we have to face.

Miss Chanty has finally addressed the issue with Eric Omondi after the comedian took to his social media to share a break up message.

Have they broken up? Eric Omondi sends Chantal cryptic message

Well Miss Chanty responded to the post saying

Hello guys, I hope this finds you well i have been silent for a while…Eric and i have had long discussions for the past one month. As you all know my family lives in italy and its been really challenging for both of us.

I love eric and i will always love him and we are okay; we created the best of moments together, we shared our dreams and visions but most importantly we shared our lives. And i will always cherish every single moment. 



As i write this post i want to ask God to always protect you and your dreams until our paths meet again.

I hate goodbyes so it’s not a goodbye its more like a see you later.
I will always be here for you ANYTIME, ANYDAY



Read more


What he really means when he says ‘I need space’

Marital therapist Andrew G Marshall is the author of How Can I Ever Trust You Again? and Infidelity from Discovery to Recovery in Seven Steps.

In an article published on Dailymail, he says there are four reasons why men need space.

But what does ‘I need space’ really mean – and how should you respond to it?


Many times Ladasha Belle has proved she is a stylish celebrity baby!


1 He’s taking back control


‘I need time for myself’, or, ‘You’re always on my back’. He withholds vital pieces of information – such as the date of his brother’s stag party – so you find out from someone else, or at the very last moment.


There is a growing trend to be not just partners but ‘best friends’ too, and be involved in every corner of each other’s lives. In the first flush of love or the high of having a new baby, it is easy to put aside personal needs to make our partner happy or for the greater good of the relationship. However, we all need ‘me’ time as well as ‘family’ time. Worse still, your partner could be feeling ‘controlled’, as though you have one mental picture of who he is (for example, driving a practical family car) while he has quite another (eg, behind the wheel of a sports car). Although you fear that his idea of space is to be free of all family responsibilities, he’s really just asking for the occasional break with the boys or a chance to pursue a particular hobby.

Issa baby affair: Sauti Sol manager and wife expecting their second child

2 He’s stressed-out by arguments


‘I’m tired of arguing’, or, ‘Have it your own way’. He walks out in the middle of a row or threatens to leave (but backs down a couple of hours later).


SAD: Heart felt message from Kirinyaga Woman Rep to nephew after Arusha accident



Two types of relationship end up with this kind of ‘I need space’ crisis on the man’s part. In the first, both partners fight like cat and dog – often about small things (sometimes even about the way they argue). In the second, the woman is permanently angry – often because she feels ignored or not listened to – and her partner is tiptoeing round the argument. Although the man might be hoping to avoid a scene, it just makes his partner angrier. In both scenarios, nothing is resolved and everybody gets more frustrated.

If you tend to be the angry one, your partner is simply exhausted from all the arguing, or avoiding arguments, and believes that withdrawing and switching off is his only way of coping. At this milder end of the scale, ‘space’ means a chance to lick his wounds and recover.

If the rows have been going on for a long time, he might have closed down and refused to argue, stormed out of the house or threatened to leave. At this more serious end, he fears that your relationship’s problems might be insoluble, and asking for ‘space’ – by which he means a temporary separation – might shock you into truly listening to him.

We’re Smitten: Meet Mike Mondo’s hunky chef brother – Photos

3 He’s feeling under pressure


‘I’m fed up with putting everyone else first’, or, ‘This is my time’. He stays out until 3am without calling, or buys expensive guy stuff but hardly uses it.


Men expect to solve their problems on their own. So instead of asking for help when the stress gets too much, they pretend everything is OK and work harder, drink more and get more depressed – until they suddenly announce that they need space. This sort of crisis is especially common if your partner has had a setback at work – someone has been promoted over his head or he’s lost his job – or his mother or father has died. Losing a parent reminds us that we are not immortal and makes us question everything in our lives. If this is your situation, then your man has been feeling under so much pressure that he fears that he’s about to crack up. He is probably already acting irrationally – wildly excited about a new project but quickly dropping it, or getting moody for no obvious reason. In his mind, only by creating space between the two of you and thus removing one of his causes of stress (the ‘demands’ he believes are coming from you and the children) can he hope to keep his sanity.


4 He’s tempted to stray


‘Were we ever truly in love?’ or, ‘We’ve grown apart’. Suddenly, he has new interests, spouts views that could belong to someone else or spends a lot of time getting ready for work.

Celebs married to spouses younger/older than them by almost 10 years


One of your partner’s work colleagues or friends may have crossed the line from being ‘just friends’ into something dangerous. The two of them are probably no longer talking about the sales figures, but are sharing secrets about how ‘unhappy’ they are at home. Online friends are particularly worrying – because people are quicker to trade secrets and fantasies in a virtual relationship, and it is easier for your man to kid himself that a se3y text is not really cheating.

Fortunately, if he is asking you for space, he is unlikely to have begun a full-blown affair as the unfaithful unilaterally grab their space by sleeping with someone else. However, he is certainly fantasising about one, or may imagine that he’s discovered his soul mate. In this case, wanting space can be his way of keeping his options open. On one hand, he’s laid down his marker that your relationship is in trouble and given himself permission to discover whether he has a future with his friend. On the other, he has not closed the door on his marriage, and can easily return if it’s all been a big mistake.


How to write a novel in 30 days


Author Chris Baty insists he can help us get it out.

Baty’s top tips…

Planning Your Mission

List the ingredients you think make a good novel. If you really want to write a book about a pair of superpowered, kung-fu koalas who wear pink capes and race through the city streets, do it.

Make a list of what bores and depresses you in a book. Avoid them.Consider your characters; how old are they? What sex? What do they do? Who are their friends and family? Don’t panic if you don’t have a plot. Characters will eventually demand that certain actions be taken. There’s something uniquely thrilling about them taking charge.

Sketch plot lines: can someone get fired? Can a relationship implode? Can they get a disease? Fall in love with someone wildly inappropriate? Don’t worry if a plot seems hackneyed. It’s what your characters do with it that matters.Past a certain point, novel planning just becomes another excuse to put off writing your novel. The biggest foe is not a lack of talent, it’s a lack of deadline. Work out when you can fit writing into your day. You’re going to produce 11,600 words a week.

Don’t worry about producing a brilliant first draft. Ernest Hemingway said: ‘The first draft of anything is s***.’

Week One 

Cruising for characters, panning for plots and the first exciting glimpse of the book within

Confiscate your Inner Editor. S/he can return at the end of the month. Set regular writing goals and stick to them. Don’t worry too much about your first sentence. It is not a predictor of what will follow so just go ahead and start with whatever image or statement occurs to you.

Top Tips

  • Jot down the names of your characters to stop a Mike becoming Matt or Mick as you write.
  • Eat peppermints: a Nasa-funded study showed the peppermint plant increased alertness by 30 per cent.
  • Don’t delete anything, italicise it, for when you return for the rewrite.
  • Start a ‘Novel Notes’ file with jokes, plot ideas and dialogue.
  • Make a list of what scares you – fears, smells, objects – and consider injecting them into your story.
  • If you spend enough time with your characters, the plot simply happens. As Ray Bradbury said: ‘Your intuition knows what it wants to write, so get out of the way.’

 Week Two

Storm clouds, plot flashes and the return of reality

Week Two hurts: you have to solve a year’s worth of plot and character problems in one over-caffeinated week.

Do not consider starting again – even if you hate what you’ve written.

Make a big change happen in your story or take your characters out of their comfort zone. Give someone amnesia. But keep writing.

Ask a couple of friends to meet – outline the characters and plot, and ask them what they think should happen next. Hit 25,000 words by week’s end.

Top Tips 

  • Use in-between moments – showers, runs, commuting – to play with the plot in your brain.
  • Be outrageous: make Betty a lion tamer instead of a librarian. Write with no thought to the consequences.
  • Don’t worry about ruining the story by taking it down the wrong path – as long as you’re moving the story forward you’re doing great. If you’ve completely lost the heartbeat of the story, double back to the last place in the manuscript you loved and begin again from there.

Week Three

Do something reckless – kill a character

You need 35,000 words by the end of the week.

Let loose ends begin lashing themselves together and create connections and passageways through your novel.

Top Tips

  • Experiment with new writing locations.
  • Break things – in your novel. Pick a character that’s been causing grief and do something reckless. Kill them or exile them. Making a mess of your story feeds your imagination.
  • Go outdoors with a newspaper, a pen and a notebook. Close your eyes. When you open them spot ‘Your Person’ and write down everything about them. Close your eyes. Open your paper on a random page and let your finger choose a spot. Open your eyes. The thing you’re pointing to has a link to the person you just collected. Work it into your next chapter.

Week Four

The sprint for the finish

Love your body. After three weeks of high-intensity typing your body will be feeling some pain. Take breaks every 15 minutes to stretch the muscles in your arms and shoulders. Look through your notebook to make sure you have included all the good stuff.

Consider feeding weather into your story. Send in a monsoon and follow a raindrop in its broken progress from cloud to gutter. Weather can be fun to write.

If you are on target for your word count then consider writing the last part of the novel in pen and paper.You’ll be forced to take your story slower and reflect a little longer before committing words to the page.

Top Tips 

  • Explore prologues, epilogues and alternative endings if you run out of story before you hit 50,000.
  • Get the characters out of their comfort zone and take away the things they need most.

I wrote a novel, now what?

Truman Capote famously compared finishing a book to taking a favourite child outside and shooting him. You may feel tingles of loss. Have a holiday from your novel – for two to six weeks.

When you’ve got a little distance from your manuscript, then you will be ready to finally read it. Just read it and take notes of your impressions and make comments from a reader’s perspective. The key to editing is to slow down.

A rewrite and edit will take between six months to a year. And if you can lift a scene or a character out of the book entirely and not break the story you don’t need

Editing Tips

Create a ‘Novel Cuts’ file. Use this for every deletion longer than a couple of sentences. Think about the motivation of each character – what they want more than anything else in the world, and what prevents them from getting it.

By the end of the story everyone should have changed in an interesting way. You’ll want to focus the story and fix the flow. Find two to five readers you trust and send them your novel for their thoughts. But remember this tip from author Neil Gaiman: ‘When people tell you something’s wrong or doesn’t work they are almost always right. When they tell you exactly what they think is wrong and how to fix it, they are almost always wrong.’

Finding An Agent

Don’t send a rough draft. Make sure you have done everything you possibly can to make it the best it can be. Have a number of people read and comment on it before you send it out.

Don’t send your manuscript to random agents. You’ll want to find an agent who represents books like yours. Search the web and twitter feeds and read their biographies. Then when you write to them let them know why you think your book fits with the rest of their list.

Submit your book to multiple agents simultaneously. Otherwise you could wait 25 years before you find one (see rule below). When emailing an agent paste in the first five pages of the book so they can get a taste of your writing.

God is in the detail. Proof-read and spell-check your work carefully or find someone who will do this for you if that’s not your strength.

Be patient. It’s not unheard of for agents to take a year to get back to you. But don’t be afraid to follow up with a friendly call every other week.