He’s evasive about marriage: Celebrities like Diamond Platnumz has stalled several times in marrying two of his baby mam’s after publicly declaring his intention to. He never put a date to it. If he is evasive about the future and doesn’t talk or want to chat about getting married, he is not ready to take the plunge.
He’s selfish: You could date for years but not really know if they’re wasting your time if the end game for the two of you is not clear – marriage- and the the details surrounding this event.
Indecisiveness: if he can’t make a decision perhaps he isn’t ready for marriage because he procrastinates way too much about personal relationships. His lack of decision making is a major sign siz.
He fears marriage: Give up his freedom? NEVER! He is downright fearful. I have heard many men say they live in a constant state of fear over losing their freedom and aren’t motivated to walk down the aisle.
A man on Reddit has painted a horrible picture of why they no longer pursue women in a thread that’s generated 80k views.
In the thread he said its the womens’ fault that they no longer pursue women and not much will change that.
On the Tuesday morning conversation, Mike Mondo – sitting in for Maina Kageni- also wanted to find out why men are too quick to take ladies to their house without dating.
He sought to find out why the dating game has changed, that a man meets a woman and on the same day she is taken to his house for bizniz. Why don’t men want to get to know a woman first?
woman are on heat, they ahve that urge to go to your house, so if you meet her on that day and you please her she follows you, you just find her there, i have taken hetr to a hotel discussed soemthign small and i took her to my house
Okay, let us have a closer look to what usually happens in “approaching-the-girl” scenario.
If a guy sends friend request, he is desperate.
If a guy sends Hi, he is creep.
If a guy is being polite, he is nice zoned.
If a guy expresses his feelings, he is too dramatic.
If a guy doesn’t expresses his feelings, he is just playing with the girl.
If a guy doesn’t approach the girl second time because she was playing it hard in the first time, he is dumb.
If a guy approaches the girl second time, he is too creepy.
If a guy is good with academics, he is nerd-zoned.
If a guy can’t read her signals, he is stupid.
If a guy does read her signals, he thinks too much and got carried away.
If a guy asks her number, she says she already has a boyfriend.
If he has good looks and physique, the girl is looking for someone more career-oriented not a gym-obsessed.
If a guy is using dating app, he is just looking for a fling.
If a guy approaches a pretty girl, he is going out of his league.
If a guy is an introvert or shy, well, introverts never pursue women. XD
If a guy is extrovert, he is a playboy.
And of course, if a guy is too close to a girl, he is friend-zoned.
These thoughts were echoed by another man on Classic who said ‘If i find you in the streets tunaenda hiyo kwangu, no dating, kazi nimalize, ati dating ninabebe tunaenda kwenda, una sema hii ni ndege yangu nitembee nayo, there is no time to take her on dates, then you find she is taken by someone else.’
But in all honesty girls do confuse guys leading to all sortsa situanshionships out here.
Is a marriage healthy when one spouse has to ask for permission to do anything, even leave the house to go shopping?
That is the challenge facing one Kenyan marriage after a man bragged how hi wife is required to ask for permission at least five months in advance, if she wants to see her relatives.
The humiliation and embarrassment he puts her through stems from the fact that way too many Kenyan women have the freedom to do whatever they want nowadays.
Therapists and other marital experts says that different decisions require different input from your spouse. For instance if you want to make a major career move, then that requires your spouses input, but others like going to the supermarket only requires notifying g him as courtesy.
So this husband doesn’t believe his wife can be entrusted to make a good decision.
He told a stunned Maina Kageni that
‘There are these things called womens rights, they want to won things, they need freedom to go anywhere without being asked questions. But sio kwangu. She cannot go anywhere even if I’m not performing, they should remian at home look after me and kids. If I’m not performing I can give her money to make up for it. But she should ask for permission because I own her, even her name changes to mine. I expect my wife to ask for permission if she wants to go somewhere she is mine and she should behave the way I say and she should tow the line because she got that rib from me. I can’t allow my women to hop from bed to bed without permission. She should ask for permission five months prior to see her relatives’
A little bit harsh if you ask me, but to each his own.
When you’ve been in a relationship with someone for some time, you should be able to read them and know when they are in a good or bad mood.
So fellas if your girlfriend is ticked off at you right now, would you be able to see through the hidden signs?
Here are some signs she is big mad
1. She stops being the first to get in touch
We all know a happy women will always be the first to make plans and she will happily text, call and get your approval. But when she goes silent on phone she is mad. You won’t hear from her.
2. Her responses are terse
When a girl is ahppy, her texts or responses in person or on phone will be super cute and sound like a romance movie. Yes, I’m cheesy like that. Sue me. But when her angry mood reflects on her replies, that is the best way to know that she is not happy. But then again silence is a sign she is also mad.
3. She stops using that affectionate nickname and refers to you in your ID name
When your girlfriend is angry and upset she won’t use the terms of endearments. So no more Daddy, babe or boo and instead what you get is Hello Michael or Tito That formal use of your name is trouble for you.
4. She zones out
Not participating in things that once interested her is a major sign that she isn’t in a good mood.
5. She stops hugs, kisses and being playful
We love dishing out hugs and touches like a Kenyan issuing a bribe. Yup, so when she is no longer being affectionate she’s angry.
Is she a no go zone or fair play? It’s important to be clear if it is worth it still being in that relationship. If you still want in, tackle her, if not bounce because handling this person for the rest of your life will need a man with will power.
Talk to them when the time is right
Give it time, don’t think anytime is the right time to talk to her. Her stubborn streak is not up to talking just yer bro. Wait and when you eventually see her hanging around you but not talking, jump right in. It indicates she could in the mood to tolerate you and listen.
Change your attitude
This is not the time to go off on her. Step back and although it may seem you are backing down, it isn’t. She will silently appreciate your attempt to give her time to cool off.
Women do lots of things you don’t understand when they leave a bad relationship.
If you are an oldie like me and watched the romantic film ‘Waiting to exhale’ the part where actress Angela Basset collects all her cheating mans clothes, takes them to the car she bought him and burns everything resonates with many woman.
She plays the part of Bernadine Harris who finds out her man is leaving her after 11 years in marriage for a white woman. She was angry she started the company working her as* off and denying herself a good life so that her man can have time to make money, but he leaves her anyway.
Even the cops who came to investigate the matter were lost for words when she said she was burning trash.
But can you blame her?
A woman mad as hell about cheating men called into the Classic 105 show where she narrated what should happen to such men. Weuh!
‘Men can only give you three things; pregnancy, brokeness and heartache. That’s it. That is why we leave when they are at work. You leave with everything including their underwear, that is how you deal with them, mpaka uwaibie au uwanyanganye because they don’t understand’
My Uncle Ben went through this. His wife went to the USA to help their daughter who was about to give birth. That was the last time he saw her. She has been gone for 11 years. He is lonely, he is broken. He opens the drawer in the bedroom, and her clothes are still there.
Here are comments explaining why fathers remain lonely in their golden years:
some of our dads here are deadbeat.were it not for our mums some of us would not have finished school, imagine the mum has been the image of the family despite the madharau na kutusiwa na bwanake,domestic violence as kids watch all that, mtoto ataside na mamake.
I already foresee myself abroad hosted by my children taking a break from this camel. Like this morning he seems to be on some hormonal imbalance, biting off everyone’s head.
While it should not be that way, fathers need to be role models for their children as they bring them up. Most men tend to gravitate towards treating their wives similar to what they learnt from their fathers. #MainaAndKingangi
its all about how your dad raised you,treated and the relationship he had with your mum. though there are some thick headed women who mistreat their husbands,men play a major role in determining how kids will treat them later. #mainaandkingangi
Men should style up, uwache watoto wakiwa wadogo.the ana showup wakiwa watu wazima.
Fellas and more specifically Kikuyu men, do you ever wonder what goes through a woman’s mind when you are getting intimate?
Alot! She is wondering why you don’t engage in pre-activites before landing the anaconda.
This was revealed during the Friday morning conversation where women insisted that Kikuyu men are the most unromantic of the Male species in Kenya.
A woman in a phone call told Maina that all they do is drink and that ‘mostly wengi wao wamepotelea kwa pombe’.
Co host Mwalimu chimed in saying ‘that’s a misconception and kikuyu men work very hard’ something that Maina took issue with and dismissed the thought ‘this is an accusation that’s been hanging over their heads for long. They have got no romantic bone in them’.
Ladies what has been your experience with Kikuyu men?
One woman bitterly said she has always wanted more from her unromantic husband
‘They are a waste. All they think about is buroti maguta maguta and their cows and that’s what makes them annoying. I want a man who gives me attention’.
Another woman said ‘my goodness I was dating this one who thought money was everything. When I call him, he would only send me 10,000 when I tell him honey I want us to talk. I just looked for a Luo man. Wenye wana roho wajaribu kikuyu men.’
Another damning accusation came from a wife who said ‘it’s true Kikuyu men are unromantic. They jump on you like a boda boda we stay with them coz of money but have a mkamba or luhyia for a spare, hiyo kazi ya boda boda siwezi they are useless ‘.
Dear Classic 105 fam, what are your thoughts about this highly emotive topic? Drop your comments below.
It’s absolutely insane for a man trying to handle a very very loud woman. She is constantly talking over him, and I see it in my friends. It’s brutal.
She has absolutely no idea what an inside voice is and how to apply it. Aki pole guys.
Imagine trying to get Akothee to speak with her inner voice? I can’t picture it, for she is this woman. CALPOLIS!!
If her man is a bedroom bully, she will be loud and nothing can stop her from expressing loudly how she feels. Your neighbors will also be constantly knowing y our business. Pole!
During an argument, he or she who speaks loudest wins. Always expect your arguments to be intense
You will never forget that you are loved. This is a good one right? For men who love positive affirmations, a loud woman will always make sure you you never forget you are loved and the cute shout outs are a plus.
Not responding to texts quickly because of some rule that says you should wait for a period of time
Dating multiple people with the pretext you are on the lookout for the one
Offering the person breadcrumbs of yourself instead of wholeheartedly being with someone. What this means is that the person you are with offers a piece of themselves to keep you around, just incase something else does not work out, they can still come back to you.
Snooping around instead of asking. Ask them about any other relationships instead of stalking on social media, or harassing their friends for information about you and making the wrong conclusions.
Intentionally making the other person jealous. If you are making yourself seem like every other girl or boy wants you to make them jealous, this is a dirty mind game you need to stop.
Pretending to not be interested in the new person.
Holding out on intimacy hoping to make the other person commit. Don’t use it as a prize, what if they finally get it and still chose to bounce? Then what!
Dating a friend can seem like a great option if you have decided you are done and dusted with trying other things.
Plus they make you feel secure right? So why not take the plunge?
Here’s what you need to know before dating your pal
Don’t involve your other friends immediately in this. We all want to share details about a new love to our friends, but if the two of you are friends who already share mutual friends, then that’s a whole different ball game.
Expect things to be super awkward in the beginning. The first intimate encounter will be weird, but keep in mind that you are transitioning from friends into lovers.
What relationship advise would men give women? Men offer the best advice since they know how other men think. This article will focus on 16 tips that men want to give to women.
A thread on Twitter from men giving legit dating advise was prompted by a female twitter user @AnnaFlag of Haiti, who asked men only to respond tot he question
Give us women some relationship advice .
We picked 16 tips you can read and share below:
Don’t be afraid to contradict us when we say shit. We will not accept to change that shit there and then but we will subtly change it later on slowly. Men don’t want yes women we want a woman who can criticize us so that we get better for us both.
Put love to the side. Give yourself up to loneliness, keep building yourself. Start a business, get new hobbies, chase greatness…and then once you built yourself up… you will attract exactly your match. It might not be perfect, but it’s better than what you attracting now.
Believe our actions the first time, and don’t make excuses for it. If he shows you he ain’t shit once, believe it. If he consistently shows up for you, believe that.
Please stop asking “do I see myself with you in 10 years” like I barely know what ima do tomorrow let’s just enjoy the vibes we got now and see where it takes us, just know if we dating I’m obviously tryna build a future together
Don’t expect your man to be a mind reader. WE STUPID!!! Just be straight up and exact what you want and expect from us. Lay your standards out and don’t settle for nothing less from him. If he starts slipping check him. When we love you it’s nothing we won’t do to make you happy.
6. Brother Shaquille Sunflower
Simple shit, if he’s not doing it then you aren’t the one 🤷🏾♂️ and that goes for anyone. Stop letting people condition you for abuse. If you point out a behavior or how something mad you feel and their response is to argue/get defensive or cut off access to them just dead it
If a dude’s energy changes and he isn’t as attentive & caring, please be the Queen that you are and move on. You don’t have time for niggas to be inconsistent. Don’t give him the benefit of doubt either, someone (another female) is the reason he’s changing 90% of the time.
1. Keep your girlfriends out of your business.
2. Never compare your relationship to other people’s social media highlights
3. Support his goals and dreams
4. Set boundaries, standards and expectations from day 1.
5. Pay attention to your senses. They never lie.
Get ahead of the B.S by letting a man know what you’re looking for in the relationship BEFORE you start anything. And if he says he’s looking for something serious with you too, wait before you’re an active part of his life before doing anything you would regret if he was lying.
Stick to the lines and standards you set. Compromise is fine but if you have a standard or a non-negotiable, don’t negotiate it. A man will rise to it if he really want you
Your friends should never be treating you better/hyping you up more than the man you’re dating (meaning he needs to do better for you). Men can not be “stolen”, if they slept with someone else it’s because they WANTED to.
Don’t believe who he seems to be until after the 3rd or fourth month. That’s his representative you’ve been seeing. It normally wears off around then and he can’t keep up the good guy BS if it isn’t in him to begin with.
If a guy leaves you and comes back its because he found something better but they wont put up with his bullshit.
A confused man is a man with options
If he keeps saying he doesn’t want a relationship right now, the ” with you ” is silent.
14. L.A quan
If a man seems interested one day and uninterested another. He talking to 5 other women and doesn’t know what he wants. Leave his confused ass to play games with someone else.
Understand a man may shy away from an independent wmen bc he thinks she can provide structurally for herself & thus doesn’t need him.
Recognize this & tell him you need him for emotional fulfillment, for the nurturing relationship you desire…which he can provide.
1. Men who know they want you do not “take it slow”
2. Don’t fall for the leash method
3. Effort is key. Pay attention to how hard he tries to make time
4. Good men won’t ask you to do something they wouldn’t do.
5.NEVER COMPROMISE YOUR FAITH
Here’s how to not pile the pressure on your spouse for that perfect marriage.
Myth 1: That soulmates exist
Myth 2: That both partners must agree on everything for a relationship to be great – conflict naturally occurs and its over fiancnes, children, investing among other issues. Arguments are bound to happen.
Myth 3: That you and bae have to have common interests for your relationship to last
Myth 4: You have to live together to test the water – Literally so many Kenyans live together before they even think about marriage and argue that this is the only way to know your partners character if you live with them first.
Myth 5: Relationships that are meant to be, will be easy
Myth 6: Making love creates a greater bond – A demanding job or other life burden doesn’t have to permanently impact closeness with your partner,
Myth 7: Couples should schedule intimacy – Spontaneity is the spice of life.
Myth 8: If my partner loves me, they will be with me only – There is a chance your relationship could hit a rough patch, and he or she has an affair.
Myth 9: Denying them Twa Twa will make them do whatever you want
Myth 10: Having a child will strengthen your relationship – When you think that a child will improve your relationship, it only adds to the complications.
Myth 11: Jealous is a sign he truly care – Secure and confident people don’t think this way
Myth 12: Romance should come naturally – After some time, the thrill of falling in love can wear off and romantic gestures may seem fewer and far between
2. I promise I will never check out another woman
Jaber very nice. There are way too many beautiful Nairobi women for him not to stare and perhaps desire. Here’s the thing about a guy promising never to check out other girls: it’s probably not possible.
3. I promise I will never judge you
There are times he wont understand you and let out these thoughts. When he exposes these thoughts, you girl are likely to get mad, therefore think he has broken a promise.
5. I promise to change my ways for you
He extends an olive branch when he does something wrong, and promises he has turned over a new leaf. Do you believe him?
Does he promise to vhange soon or does he ask for time (years) to do so. Cut him some slack and praise him for any small change he does. Appreciate his efforts no matter how small. But if he isn’t girl, kick him to the curb. The red flags are all there for you to see. He is not misleading you in any way.
7. I promise to always love you and never leave you
Can we predict what will happen next month? No. 2020 is actually proving alot of things wrong. Things happen, people change and situations arise, maybe an entanglement.
Hiding assets in marriage is more common than most women expect.
Could your husband be hiding financial assets?
Sneaky ways men hide financial assets from their partners in the event of a divorce or death was discussed on the morning show.
An angry husband called in and instructed his wife to listen in as he confessed to Maina that he hides money and assets from her and she won’t lay a finger on it – EVER.
‘Maina let me tell you, she is here listening, siwezi mpatia kitu.’
According to experts, this is the highest form of infidelity in marriage – not being open about money.
The husband continued saying that
I am in my house and wife is here you should see how she is looking at me, we were listening to you talk about financial assets.unachoma maina, let me tell you Maina, last week we went to bury a guy who had passed on, he had a first wife who had deserted him with kids, so he married a second wife and she took in the kid for the first wife, and when the guy died the first wife came back after she learnt there is possible compensation, and she says she doesn’t recognize the second wife who has been taking care of the kid she took in six years. If you have wealth keep it a secret, my wife is hearing me say this, it is not a secret because these peole are here purely for what you have, sasa kama huyo alirudi after six years so women are there because of what you’ve got in your pocket, I feel nothing that my wife is here listening to me tell you this, she deserves nothing’
The opinionated husband stunned Maina who exclaimed, ‘Ngai ngai ebu listen to this mad guy’.