Here’s What Emotional Manipulators Do To Their Partners

When dating we usually want to see the best in the object of our attraction and sometimes it ends up clouding our judgement. We end up with manipulators in the name of partners but we are too “in love” to notice until someone mentions it.

If you suspect that you are in an emotionally manipulative relationship, these habits should confirm for you. Manipulators are not interested in communicating — they’re only interested in being right.

1. They
downplay your feelings – If you are hurt by something your partner said and you tell them, instead of acknowledging the issue they will simply point out your mistake. They will tell you why you were wrong, what you did and dismiss your feelings by saying you are overreacting and taking things too seriously. This will all be said in a calm manner that will make you question yourself. With time you will believe that you are wrong and they are right.

2. They Deflect Their Behavior Back To You – Once in while you will be able to stand up for yourself and tell them the things that you feel aren’t right. But instead of addressing the issue, it will be turned against you. They will state the reasons behind their actions and turn it around to you, accusing you of having done this or that, which led them to behave the way they did. “if you hadn’t done A or B I would not have insulted you” sounds familiar right? This will make you reduce the need to communicate and they will always be right because you have become “dumb”.

3. They are two different individuals – When you are in public they seem loving and fun, until you become the topic of discussion in front of friends all in the name of fun. It’s all jokes and laughter until that deep personal comment drops and you have to keep the plastic smile because it hit deep down. You mention it later in private and suddenly “you’re too serious, have a laugh sometime” “ or are you on your period” comments surface. They will blame it on someone and make themselves appear innocent.

4. They don’t Explain Themselves – Emotional manipulative people do not like to explain themselves because they like to make you feel dumb and stupid, plus they are not exactly being honest and don’t know how to communicate effectively. They will not say what they need then blame you for not providing it. They will then make you feel like you are beneath them by claiming you cannot understand them. It’s a futile attempt to ask them to try to explain it, too. This is a failed exercise on your part.

Do yourself a favour and walk away because you will be drained.

How To Deal With A Possessive Spouse

Your spouse is attractive, smart, kind and many more, which is part of the reason why you are attracted to them. That doesn’t mean that other people won’t notice that and they won’t try to get a piece of them.

The challenge comes when and how they handle flirtatious attention and how you deal with it. There are limits that help you walk the not-so-thin line between being a possessive whacko and an indifferent jerk.

Alpha? – If your husband/wife is getting more attention than he/she would like, they are completely capable of warding off the admirer themselves. The last thing they would like is for you to come in, stake your claim and make a scene. In a social gathering, if you feel like someone is making moves on your partner, see how comfortably he/she handle it. If things are under control, let them be. If you feel the need, smoothly join the conversation, and with subtle hints let it be known that you are together. This would seem harmless and also get the point across.

Rage patrol – If you are dealing with something that’s not a one-off situation and someone is being resistant to your hints, you might need a more firm approach. If your spouse says, they can handle it, back off and let them. If you disagree with your partner on someone’s intentions, share your concerns with them but let them take the call. This is also a crucial trust barrier in your relationship where you prove to them that you trust them to make the right call, and they expect you to let them control the situation their way. If they do ask you for help, avoid any uncomfortable confrontations. Let the person know that their behaviour is making your spouse uneasy and that they should respect your marriage. If they continue to pursue, it qualifies as harassment and you can seek help. But don’t get violent.

Jealous much – It is important for couples, to keep the social lives they had as singles, active. They should go out with their individual friends as well as a couple. However, if one partner is highly jealous or possessive, it may hamper the relationship. It is important to trust your partner. If you feel that certain situations such as parties and alcohol make you feel more jealous than usual, try keeping such triggers in check.

-TOI

Reasons why you should exercise as a couple

There are a number of physical and emotional benefits associated with couple workouts. They boost passion, synchronisation and a supportive spirit between couples. Throw in some endorphins and you have a real power boost in your relationship.

Here are the five most important benefits of working out as a couple:

1. Stay motivated: When you feel demotivated or lazy, your partner can boost your morale and get you moving. Research suggests that getting onboard a health and fitness plan with your partner increases the chances of you both sticking to the plan and achieving your weight loss or fitness goals.

2. Try new things: You might be into strength training, while your partner might be a yoga fan. Embarking on a workout plan with your partner offers you the chance to learn many new things. You can take up a fitness activity of your choice for a month and let your partner choose one for the next. Acroyoga is an activity that might interest both of you as it involves performing traditional yoga poses in pairs. It involves intimate and challenging routines that help improve flexibility, balance and strength.

3. Rekindle the passion: A healthy competition between you and your partner may be the best way to reawaken the excitement in your relationship and boost your libido. Training together and setting new challenges can be a great way to make things exciting between the two of you again. It can help you change the dynamic of your relationship to rekindle the passion it needs.

4. Enhance the efficiency of workouts: Research suggests that even the presence of another person affects your ability to perform an activity. Having your partner workout with you will make you feel more competent while doing an exercise and could help boost your speed and energy output.

5. Strengthen bond between partners: Couples that workout together have testified that exercising together has helped them feel more grounded and enabled them to start focusing on other important aspects of their life together. Supporting and motivating your partner to stick to a long-term fitness plan will bring the two of you closer