We use lifts to escape the hustle of climbing stairs and save time but uncivilised people’s annoying habits often make us wish we broke a sweat anyway.
1. They step on us, somehow usually when it has rained, when the mud can’t simply be wiped off.
If you come from areas without tarmack roads use the stairs or keep your ‘tired’ muddy shoes at a safe distance, or better still take a smack on the head graciously because some of us are crazy.
2. They squeeze into crowded lifts.
My friend, the lift is not going to heaven, and if it were, it would absolutely come back for the ‘saint’ that you are. Learn to let go: you can get where you’re going a minute or so later because it’s never that serious.
It gets more awkward when the lift buzzes because of excess weight . They came in last but they expect another to get off.
3. And then they fart.
Most elevators in Kenya do not have air conditioners and you dare fart, really?
When the elevator is crowded, you subject people to even more torture.
Sort your gas out at the washrooms available wherever you came from, or out in them where there is enough fresh air to subdue it.
4. They assume we weren’t waiting for the lift and make their way in first.
I know, people don’t queue for lifts but unless you’re in your third trimester of pregnancy, physically or mentally challenged, let those who came before you get in first. They have waited longer than you have anyway.
Nobody cares that you’re in a hurry, who isn’t anyway?
5. They talk too loudly on their phones.
Answering your calls is the norm, but unless you are harmonising sweet lyrics to a music producer like Ne-yo and Usher maybe do, we don’t want to get involved.
The subject of your conversation and your voice make all the difference. Spare us the gossip with your neighbor about your landlord, or about a boyfriend you really should break up with.
Please keep it low.
6. They fill up the space in the lift to make it up just one floor.
Many of us may be lazy but this is simply annoying and silly, especially when someone going farther than you are misses the lift.
Save us the peskiness of stopping lifts on every floor, and help your heart a little by going up just two or at most three staircases.
7. They know we have missed the lift by a jiffy but just won’t hold it for us.
Be humane and press the button, that’s all it takes. Small acts of kindness go a long way after all.
That guy you hold the lift for could end up your prince charming, and that lady could administer first aid if anything happened to you.
8. They hold the lift for so long waiting for their friends.
When people fancy taking their time to get somewhere they buy private cars.
Now read this one out loud: lifts are for public use and should never be used at anyone’s convenience and at the expense of others.
You surely don’t expect us to join in your wait, or engage in small talk, and your friends won’t get lost. Wait for them at the other side of the building.
Stalling the lift for someone who will most likely take a while is selfish, insensitive and disrespectful.
9. They stand too close us yet the lift has plenty of room.
We just can’t take this! There’s something called personal space, and some of us prefer a lot of it.
Move! Move! It is so uncomfortable, especially because we most likely don’t know you and don’t want to know you!
Dear men, you may be yearning for a date with that pretty lady, but please note that body contact should not be initiated unnecessarily.
Worse still, some of you are perverts, sticking close so you can brush against her breast or her behind. Get a life!
10. They press the wrong buttons making the elevator stop at more floors.
I’m not saying you don’t know how to use elevators, but please ask when you are knew to a building and aren’t sure where to stop.
Using a lift is faster than taking the stairs, but pressing the wrong buttons making the elevator stop on every floor with no one getting off beats the difference.
Source : The Star