‘I want to apologize to anyone who cared about me that I ghosted,’ whispers Classic 105 presenter Mike Mondo

Mike Mondo has done something most Kenyan men loathe to do, apologize.

The Classic 105 presenter took to his social media and admitted that he is heartbroken after a certain damsel ghosted him.

FYI: Ghosting is when someone you are dating or starting to date just goes mute on you. And you have no idea why.

This led to him penning a long post about the evils of ghosting.

Mike Mondo wrote, “This is the wholly unpleasant phenomenon when someone you are dating decides to simply fade away into the ether rather than have an upfront, honest, face to face, adult conversation about why he or she no longer wants to keep seeing you. I must admit, I am guilty of this in the past. And yes, Karma handed it straight back at me. And this is what I learnt from that experience.
I’m an emotional guy, I admit, but I am not big on emotions. What I mean is, when I give, I truly give – but i have extremes, when I don’t want to give, I will hold back no matter what. Thing is I am not lukewarm in any way, I am either with it or not. That’s why I want to apologize to anyone who cared about me that I ghosted. I realize now it’s a cop-out. My deepest heartfelt apologies, and fyi, I will contact you soon to say as much.
To all those who ghost (myself included): You’re making our generation look bad. Our generation is being made to look like a bunch of dating degenerates, largely due to a toxic dating culture that condones dishonesty and has normalized shameless acts such as ghosting. Calls, texts and Facebook messages will go unanswered until a person finally “get the hint” and accept the fact that it’s over. In short, it’s the self-centered and easy way out of a relationship (or ‘almost-relationship’, or ‘situationship’ – or whatever you want to call it.). If you’ve been on the receiving end, you know that it’s a confusing and frustrating experience that most likely left you wondering why people ghost in the first place. Despite the fact that there are many other, better ways to break up with someone, it seems that people can’t seem to retire the pesky habit of ghosting.

Mike Mondo
Though daters claim they do it to avoid hurting someone’s feelings, ghosting is actually just a selfish act and easy solution to avoid broaching a difficult, emotionally wrenching conversation. I did it because it made me feel less awkward and uncomfortable—i wasn’t really taking the other person’s feelings into account at all. I ask myself sometimes, why did I treat others in a way that I, myself, would not want to be treated?
Psychologically, we’re abandoning someone, betraying their trust, and leaving them completely in the dark as to what happened and why we left. I learnt this the hard way this year after being ghosted….before the anger sets in, we turn inwards and blame ourselves. Did I do something wrong? Am I too clingy? Am I bad in bed? Is my radar broken? Am I unlovable? There’s so much mental anguish that goes into over-analyzing what happened. It’s soul-crushingly painful. Ghosting impacts your self-esteem and self-worth. It can lead to depression, which affects your sleep, appetite, concentration at work, and desire to be around friends. It can also cause anxiety in which we obsess about what happened, feel on edge, and are filled with worry and insecurity. We spend hours, days, weeks, and sometimes months trying to piece together the mystery. Besides for the inner angst, in some cases, someone is totally frozen and unable to move forward. If you attempt a new relationship you often bring baggage in which there is a lack of trust, self-doubt and fear of vulnerability, making it difficult for the new romance to flourish.
That’s why I say this, rather than wasting someone’s precious time and emotional energy that could be better invested back into the dating market, you need to commit to letting someone down in a straightforward way. Yes, it could likely be an emotionally draining face to face conversation—a tear might even be shed. However, it’s important for that persons personal growth, the emotional healing process of the person we’ve taken the time to get to know, and for the greater dating community, which both parties will be re-entering. So, in the words of the Ghostbusters song “If there’s something weird and it don’t look good, who you gonna call…?” How about your partner so that you can break things off the right way!
Have you ever been ghosted? Share your story with me below

What has your experience with Ghosting been like. Share with us on the comments section.

Tips On How To Move Forward After Someone “Ghosts” On You

In modern day dating  society many people just “ghost” or disappear without saying  anything yet you have been dating for months. They stop communicating and don’t give  a reason why, they stop picking calls and responding to texts.

You may be left wondering what to do and how to go about it but the best thing for you would be to move forward. Granted it may be hard but you can do it. Although in your journey to move forward there are things that you shouldn’t do :

Rushing back into the dating scene – Your pride’s been hurt. Your self-belief has taken a bit of a beating. You need to rebuild yourself before you take the same risks again. The simple rule that people won’t tell you is this: The more vulnerable you feel, the more likely you are to get hurt. Don’t set yourself up for more of the same.

Don’t Make It Personal – It’s easy to tell yourself that if your date/boyfriend/girlfriend suddenly vanished, it’s definitely your fault. Actually, it’s NOT. It says a lot about them — that’s a cowardly and superficial way of resolving a situation.

Don’t Try To Get In Touch – Truly, they haven’t fallen off the face of the Internet, lost their memory or been kidnapped. They’ve just decided to go after someone else instead of you. Don’t try to persuade them to come back because it won’t lead anywhere good. The less you accept that, the more humiliated and rejected you’ll end up feeling.

 Don’t try asking for a reason – Even if they were to give you a reason, they probably wouldn’t tell you the truth. Do you seriously expect someone who has so little regard for your feelings to respect you enough to give you an honest answer? Let it go, and accept that moving on is the right thing to do.

Don’t think about what could have been – Maybe you thought they were Mr./Ms. Right, and you’d have a wonderful happily-ever-after together. They didn’t, now you know that if you didn’t. Your imagination has a way of running away with you that only makes things harder. You hardly knew them, and you certainly didn’t know who they truly were .Make a binding promise to yourself like, In the future, I will get to know someone before I fall in love with them.