Every couple will have arguments and disagreements every once in a while, but that doesn’t give one the right to be rude or mean.
People often say things when angry and that is why it’s always advisable to take time out and calm down before talking to your partner.
With that in mind there are some things that no matter how angry you are, you should not say to your partner.
Here are some of the phrases that you should never ever say during a fight.
‘All this is your fault’ – It’s common to want someone else to take the blame when things go haywire. Unfortunately it doesn’t solve anything as in most cases it will be a back and forth of who did what and who didn’t do what. In the long run no problem will be solved. Instead of trading blame simply find a way to resolve the issue amicably by talking calmly. Say something like — “I felt like you ignore my sentiments and I didn’t like the way you responded, I should have said something”. This shows that you have taken responsibility for your part in the mistake.
‘You always do this’ – Saying this shows that you have been keeping track of the mistakes from previous times and haven’t forgiven. Instead you should try this approach “I would like this matter to be sorted differently unlike how we have been doing it before” and then state why you think it didn’t work previously. This will prevent going around in circles.
‘I want space/break’ – In as much as you may not mean this, it may actually end your relationship and it’s one of those statements that are hard to take back. If you accidentally say it, offer an apology immediately but know that it’s not a guarantee that your partner may want to hear of it.
‘You’re such a coward’ – This is mostly common with women and if it slips out be sure it will take a lot more than an apology because you just bruised someone’s ego. This will also put a man on the defense and it might turn into a name calling situation which you don’t need. Just say things from where you stand and how you see it without having to call out your partner.
‘You need to talk to me right now’ – There are various reasons why people don’t like talking when they are angry and it’s best to let them cool off. While your need to get answers may be important, expressing yourself in a demanding matter will not get you anywhere. Go and cool off then come back and have a decent conversation.