Men physically abused by wives fear reporting, rights group say

A civil society group has asked men not to hide incidents where they are battered by their wives.

The ‘Voice of Men and Children’ on Saturday decried that out of 10 men who are beaten and mistreated by their spouses, only three report the incidents.

Chairman James Njenga advised men to share what go through at the hands of their wives with a close friend, a pastor or a marriage counselor.

“Our aim is to ensure couples live peaceful, reduce incidences where they take each other before the police or other offices, by attaining responsible and solution-oriented families” he sad’

Rising Cases of Kenyan Men Beaten By Their Wives

Speaking at their office in Limuru constituency, Njenga said some of these issues are realised when a man commits suicide.

“Men suffer a lot but they hide those sufferings. This very bad and unfortunate” he said.
Vomec was registered as an NGO in early December, to counsel couple’s, so as to reduce cases of divorce, separation, domestic violence, murder and suicide.

“Some of these issues happen, one spouse and the couple’s children are left suffering psychologically as well as financially,” Njenga said.

But he praised women saying that they do not hide their suffering.

“Women rush to police or children’s offices to seek solutions. At times men are charged before court of law” he said.

He was accompanied by the group’s vice chairman Felix Ouma, secretary general Josephat Njagi and advisor Cyrus Koimburi.

The Star

‘A woman who beats her husband is cursed,’ Shouts Gloria Muliro’s ex

Pastor Eric Omba – Gloria Muliro’s ex-husband – has advised that women who beat their husbands should make an effort to drop such habits.

Unlike back in the day, it has emerged that women nowadays met out physical and emotional violence and abuse on their husbands, something Omba says the bible is against.

Taking to his social media platform to advise Kenyans Omba said,

Ladies Be Warned: Any Woman who beats her Husband will go straight go to hell. this is because a man is the iImage of God and a woman is just one part ,a rib that God has taken from a man.

A man is the head of the family and symbols of God in the family and a protector and the blessings come through him.

Gloria Muliro and her ex husband Eric Omba on their wedding day
Gloria Muliro and her ex husband Eric Omba on their wedding day

‘Stop investigating your men,’ Mwalimu King’ang’i advises women

Omba further pens,

But if a woman beats her husband it doesn’t matter what the husband has done, that woman is cursed and she will never enter into the kingdom of Heaven if she doesn’t repent and receive Jesus Christ.

He goes on to advise that if by any chance you are in an abusive marriage the best thing is to report it to church elders or the police if need be.

If you have problem or misunderstanding with your husband take your issue to church, to his parents or to the police but never punish your own husband.

Read more

‘I even paid my own dowry,’ Tonto exposes ex-husband’s fake life

Tonto Dike in one of her interviews revealed the fake life of her ex-husband.

Tonto disclosed how her marriage with his ex-husband was a mess and a big mistake.

She stated that her husband was violent and many at times beat her.

She goes ahead to reveal that due to the physical abuse, she has a miscarriage.

“We had an argument at one time in his room and when I am angered I don’t breath well so as I was rushing out of the room he actually used his leg to push me down and I rolled down the stairs,” she said.

Tonto confessed that she quit her marriage three times and each time she went back. The actress wanted to make it work because she was told her home will break if she left.

Celebs who almost broke our hearts with their fake wedding stunts

She also disclosed how broke her ex-husband was and that they used to stay in a rented house and not in a home they had bought, as the ex-husband claimed.

Tonto explained, “I even paid my own dowry and all the wedding expenses and even the hotel we slept at the room was paid by another man because I knew I was getting married to a poor man.”

Churchill, on the other hand, denies of having a wedding ceremony with Tonto which she says he can deny because he did not pay for any wedding.

 

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She says her marriage was full of lies right from day one, she thought this could change but that never happened.

Her experience with her mother-in-law was another dramatic issue. Any time she visited there were rituals carried out which she was uncomfortable with.

Tonto even confesses of finding the father of her son in one of the spiritual acts in his room surrounded with red candles dressed in red pants. She thought that her husband was a businessman as he claimed in one of his lies only to find out that he was a Yahoo boy.

She is of opinion that Churchill married her because of fame and she was a celebrity.

Check out more:

 

‘I miscarried after my ex husband threw me down the stairs’ Tonto Dikeh

Tonto Dikeh has said that her ex husband Olakunle Churchil never paid for anything during their wedding, and that their marriage was full of lies.

This she shared thought her You Tube channel because she wants to clear the air.

She says from the beginning there were red flags that she did not notice, as they didn’t live together at the time.

A lot of people said I was desperate for paying for my wedding.What they do not know is that I was living in Nigeria and he lived in Ghana.

When we were planning our wedding, he kept telling me to go ahead and spend, he would pay me back.

‘Please hire beautiful masseuse’s for your kinyozis’ Kenyan men beg owners

Tonto Dike With Husband Olakunle Churchill
Tonto Dike With ex Husband Olakunle Churchill

I have documents that showed that he gave me 1.7 million and out of that his family had contributed 1 million Naira.

My friends boyfriend paid for the hotel that my husband made love to me in.

Before our wedding I flew my husband from Ghana and I even paid for the drinks on our wedding day.

She adds

I asked for the money when we got married because I knew I wanted to leave him. He payed me 10 million Naira as a cover for all the things I did.

He did not spend a dime even for food. I was pregnant for this man and what was I to do given that he had promised to reimburse my cash.

I do not want to break down but right now like I did before but right now I am a tiger but I feel bad, used and I am the biggest scam Churchil ever made.

I never wanted to have a child so I was not using the child to trap him.

I had mommy issues so I was scared of losing myself until I met a man who beat me, lied to me, to get what he wanted.

She adds

I even lost a pregnancy after he pushed me down the stairs. People would ask why I did not leave what they do not know is that it is not easy to walk away.

Read more

 

Man who viciously beat up his pregnant wife in Eldoret to be arraigned in court

Police in Eldoret have arrested a slaughterhouse worker who battered his pregnant wife for three hours and tried to cut off her ear for allegedly misusing Sh500.

Nairobi restaurant manager forced to carry baby after kicking out woman for breastfeeding

 

It was the second time in 10 days that a viral video prompted public fury, compelling police to act on escalating domestic violence. Valerie Masibo told the Star in an exclusive interview on Sunday.

 

He works at the slaughter house and since we met he has been so brutal. This time, I thought he would slaughter me.

She suffered serious facial injuries; one of her nearly severed ears was reattached at Moi Referral Hospital.

The victim had been rescued by police from a house at Kipkaren Estate where she had been locked up by the suspect, identified at Nafatali Lusuli.

Nafatali Lusuli
Nafatali Lusuli, the wife batterer

A picture of her disfigured face had gone viral on social media and neighbours informed the police of the violence, leading officers to storm the house on Friday night.

Valerie Masibo
Pregnant Valerie Masibo, who was beaten by her husband

On August 1, a Winifred Mwende was severely beaten by her husband Daudi Nzomo as she lay on a dirt path in Makueni. The viral went video, including pleas from onlookers to stop. The DPP stepped in. The man was arrested.

Also read:

Kenyan sex workers tells all about their clients and about the lifestyle

 

In the latest of many similar cases, Valerie Masibo was battered. She is four months’ pregnant; she has not lost the baby. Valerie was discharged and is recovering at her aunt’s house in Eldoret. She will remain under medical care.

The suspect was arrested in the house and is being held at the Yamumbi police station. He is expected to be charged today. Eldoret South OCPD Wilson Abduba said.

We have the suspect in custody and he will be taken to court to face charges in relation to the crime.

Valerie and Lusuli have been married for five months. Valerie said

This is about the fifth time the man has attacked me viciously but this time it was so serious I could not even see after the beating. I felt like I was dying, but I thank God I am alive and free from his brutality.

She said the man, whom she started dating in March, arrived home last Friday at 6 pm and was very drunk. He accused Valerie of misusing the Sh500 he had given her for rent. Valerie said

I still had the money and as I tried to show it to him he pushed me to the ground and started using his shoe and a cooking stick to beat me.

The men then used a sharp object to cut off part of her ear, causing her to bleed profusely.

She screamed for help but the man locked the door from inside. The neighbours alerted police who arrived at the house but the man had escaped. He was arrested in the same estate.

Also read:

Jackline Mwende, Whose Hands Were Cut Off By Her Husband For Being Infertile, Is Now Pregnant

Valerie said they had known each other for a short while but they decided to stay together when she learned she was pregnant.

She was taken to the police station to identify her attacker. “When he saw me, he could not believe that he was one who inflicted such injuries. He pleaded with me to forgive him but with the suffering I have gone through, I want the law to take its course”, she said.

She said she would never return to her batterer and said she hoped that other women going through the same suffering receive help.

Here are more photos of Valeri’s disfigured face

Valerie Masibo

Valerie Masibo

Serena Williams vocalizes domestic violence conversation should expand to men-particularly young boys

Tennis superstar Serena Williams says the conversation about stopping domestic abuse shouldn’t just center around women but men as well.

According to Daily Mail,  she thinks that conversation should start with young boys.

‘I think expanding the conversation to men and expanding the conversation to young boys, it’s so important,’ she said at a launch event for a new initiative in new York on Wednesday.

SERENA

‘This is a human rights issue. We should all be treated the same. We should be treated equal. With domestic abuse, it doesn’t care what color you are, what background you’re from,’ Serena, 36, added.

‘It’s important to get the message out there – to our young men, to our boys, to our daughters – to let that new generation, and let the generation now know that, let’s stop this,’ she said. ‘Let’s change this. Let’s create a better us.’

Motherhood is a blessing! Check out Serena Williams and her daughter (photos)

The 23-time Grand Slam singles champion is the ambassador for the Allstate Foundation Purple Purse initiative, which aims to help stop domestic abuse and what it calls the financial abuse that can accompany such relationships.

Serena, who is married to Reddit co-founder Alexis Ohanian, gave birth to her first child – daughter Olympia – last September.

She said becoming a mother has made the issue of domestic violence more important to her.

‘This could be something that my daughter could face and that’s not cool,’ she explained.

‘I want her to know that she can always talk to me, and talk to other people. That maybe she doesn’t have a voice, maybe she can’t use her voice, but we can be her voice, we can support her in so many different ways,’ she said.

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Williams returned to Grand Slam play last month at the French Open but had to withdraw after reaching the fourth round due to a pectoral chest injury.She anticipates being healthy for next month’s Wimbledon tournament.

‘Oh that’s a plan, absolutely, absolutely, and I’ve been working toward it,’ she said.

She also spoke about her father, Richard Williams, and his upcoming induction into the American Tennis Association’s Hall of Fame.

Williams coached Serena and her fellow champion sister, Venus, from when they were children until they were winning titles as adults.

‘That’s really wonderful and I know he is really excited about that and I am, too,” she said. “I was just with him yesterday and we talked about it. It was great.’

S,V AND DAD

Daily Mail

Sing’antuki Ng’o: Kuria woman refuses to leave hospital after husband chopped-off her hand

Maria Rioba Musa at St Joseph Mission Hospital on Thursday during the interview
CREDIT	Manuel Odeny

Maria Rioba Musa at St Joseph Mission Hospital on Thursday during the interview CREDIT Manuel Odeny

 

She said that already her in-laws, accusing her of victimizing their son have taken all her household items.

“My children have also run away from our home, I need them to be safe with me, but in a different place,” Maria said.

Maria said her life remains in danger as long as the culprit is not arrested and charged.

“I need to have him answer before a court why he chose to make me disabled,” she said.

She was speaking to the Star at the hospital bed on Thursday where she called on well-wishers to help her get another home to take care of her children.

Her daughter, Elizabeth Ghati Musa said their family has broken down as her mother was the sole breadwinner.

Ghati said they experienced hostility from their home and going back there was not safe for them.

“Our father is still at large, we hear he is in Tanzania but he may come back to finish what he started if we go back to our home,” she said.

Vincent Were, a social worker at Ombo Hospital, asked well-wishers to come to the aid of the woman and her children as her family has abandoned her.

Maria owes the hospital Sh42,650, a bill which increases daily by Sh600.

Read more here

Man punches girlfriend in the shower because she ate the last cookie

 

A butcher punched his girlfriend in the face when he discovered she ate the last chocolate chip cookie, police said.

Richard Hessic, 31, of Port St Lucie, Florida was arrested last Thursday night following the snack-related attack on his live-in girlfriend.

When questioned by police, the 6-foot-4 butcher admitted that he became enraged when he discovered that the last of his favorite chocolate chip cookies was gone.

Hessic confronted his girlfriend of three years, a 34-year-old nurse, but he got the feeling that she was ‘blowing him off’, according to an incident report obtained by The Smoking Gun.

The victim said she tried to make light of the cookie conundrum and joked with Hessic about ‘reviewing the surveillance cameras to see who ate the cookie’.

But the illicitly devoured treat was no laughing matter for Hessic.

The girlfriend later told police she did not want to argue over ‘something so petty’ and offered to buy more cookies as a way to make it up to Hessic.

Incensed by the woman’s unwillingness to take his cookie grievance seriously, Hessic allegedly followed his girlfriend into the bathroom, ripped down the shower curtain while she was bathing and punched her on the left side of her face.

The responding officer observed in his report that while talking to the victim, he did not notice any swelling or bruising on her face.

Hessic was booked into the St Lucie County Jail on a misdemeanor charge of domestic battery.

He was later released and placed under house arrest with GPS monitoring. A judge has barred the Hessic from contacting his girlfriend.

The 31-year-old is due back in court for his arraignment on December 28.

Records show that the man was previously arrested on charges of battery, fleeing and eluding, child abuse and driving with a suspended license.

Read more: dailymail

Battered Kenyan woman exposes husband after he heard this rumor about her

Cases of domestic violence have been rampant of late. Everyday, many report cases of women who have been abused by their husbands, relatives or even the public (matatu crew) but not all of them get justice.

Human rights activists and gender-based violence organizations have always been on the forefront working towards eradicating all forms of violence against women and girls in Kenya, but it seems violence against women is not going to end anytime soon.

A Kenyan woman, identified as Leah Wambui, is a victim of domestic violence and she has finally spoken out about it for the first time.

Leah Wambui

The young mother took to social media to share her story of how she was thoroughly battered by her husband, disfiguring her lips. According to Leah, this is not the first time she has been beaten by her husband. He is used to it.

“Domestic violence at its worst, some of us still suffer in silence but not anymore nimeamua kutoa sauti. Ongea usikike,” she wrote on her Facebook account

Wambui went ahead to reveal that her husband had heard some rumour that’s why he battered her. He then begged for forgiveness later on after confirming that there was nothing serious about the rumour he had heard. Wambui has fled her home and she is currently being housed by her friend and she is calling upon well-wishers to help her.

“Ladies, may this never happen to you in the name of love. I have learned it the hard way. Some men are evil and will never change. Don’t waste your time hoping its gonna get better ruuuuuun because it only gets worse. The guy tore my clothes before my kids after hitting me hard over a rumour he heard. Continue reading “Battered Kenyan woman exposes husband after he heard this rumor about her”

Woman Whose Hands Were Chopped Off For Not Bearing Children Finally Gets Artificial Hands (Photo)

Battered woman Jackeline Mwende, whose hands were chopped off, has finally been fitted with myoelectric prosthetics hands.

The 27-year old flew to South Korea aboard a Swiss airline on September 26, for the operation.

Jackline Mwende was attacked by her husband Stephen Ngila, 34, with a panga where she also suffered multiple injuries on neck and head back in August.

Machakos man chops off wife’s hand for not bearing children

Mwende, a shopkeeper, said before the attack, she had separated with her husband for three months after failing to get pregnant.

Well, after the physical and mental trauma, Mwende has finally been fitted with artificial limbs and will be trained on how to use the limbs before she is flown back to the country.

Mwende

Mwende is expected to have returned to an 80 per cent level of normal activity by then and from the picture taken back in South Korea, she seems happy and content.

Mwende said she was surprised by the attack as doctors told the couple she was fertile while Ngila was impotent. The two had not lived together for a year, as living at their home while her husband had rented a bedsitter in Masii town.

The woman has received assistance from various quarters including the Machakos government and women’s rights activists.

Here is Mwende with her fitted myoelectric prosthetics hands.

Jackeline Mwende

 

Wow! Jealous Man Viciously Beats Up His Ex After Faking Cancer To Lure Her To His Flat

A woman who rushed to her ex-boyfriend’s side when he said he had cancer discovered it was all a ploy when he brutally attacked her with a baseball bat.

Harley Wells, 23, from Kent, England was left bloodied and bruised after Perry Morris beat her when he found out she was in a new relationship. The hairdresser’s former partner was not sick at all but had invented the sob story to get Harley alone and interrogate her about her love life.

He flew into a jealous rage after she admitted to having a new man in her life, attacking her with a foot-long baseball bat and a crash helmet: ‘I’d gone over to his house believing he was dying, but ended up being the one nearly killed.’

woman-beaten2
Harley dated Perry Morris (left, with her, in 2014) for nine months

The horrific photographs show Harley’s injuries from the brutal attack, leaving her with a broken knuckle, black eyes, and huge bruises all over her body.

When Harley first started dating Morris in February 2014, she said there we no signs of what he would become. ‘He seemed sweet and romantic, but just three months in, he became possessive and controlling. He would grill me about other men and hated me seeing friends or family.

After nine months together, Harley ended their relationship and things took a darker turn: ‘He was devastated and begged for another chance, but when I refused, he swore I’d regret it. It was a sign of things to come.’

Just weeks later, Morris spotted Harley driving and charged after her with a baton. ‘He ran at my car waving the truncheon and I swerved to avoid him – crashing into another vehicle,’ she recalled. I wasn’t hurt but it was terrifying.’

woman-beating6
Harley Wells

She reported Morris to the police in November 2014 and he was sentenced to five months in jail for harassment and banned from contacting Harley for five years. With her ex locked away, Harley moved on and started a new relationship.

In July, after four months of being brushed off, Morris called Harley, saying he had just been diagnosed with cancer and begged her to see him so he wouldn’t be alone.

‘I was expecting abuse or for him to ask for me back, but instead he told me he had cancer. I believed him, as why would anyone lie about something like that?’ she said.

They arranged to meet at a beach and Morris even appeared to take a call from the hospital about his treatment. Morris then lured her back to his flat for a ‘private chat’ – but once they arrived, his demeanour changed. ‘At first he seemed calm, but then accused me of getting off with his friend.’

beaten-woman

‘I initially denied the fling, but he promised he’d release me if I admitted it, so I confessed. He screamed that I was a slut and punched me in the face. When I staggered back, he punched me again in my other eye. I tried to scream for help through the window, but he dragged me away by my hair and punched me until I fell to the ground.’

‘I jumped down eight steps at once and ran down the street in my top and pants. I could hear him chasing me and was desperate to get away,’ she said.

Morris grabbed her, but the neighbours intervened and called an ambulance to take her to William Harvey Hospital in Ashford, Kent. Morris escaped but was arrested two days later after Harley put a photograph of him on Facebook.

He pleaded guilty to grievous bodily harm with intent, harassment, breaching a restraining order, and false imprisonment – as well as attacking another young woman in March 2015 – and was sentenced to 11 years in jail.

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woman-beaten3

 

 

 

 

 

Daily Mail

Man Chops Off His Girlfriend’s Head

Relationships are tough when there is lack of communication. In such cases, once jealousy and insecurity set in, some unions end in tragedy as in this case.

A 23 year chopping man is in custody after chopping off the head of his 19 year old girlfriend after a disagreement.

The man named Edwin Cheruiyot is said to have quarreled with the form 4 student after suspecting that she was having an affair.

Trans Mara DCIO David Njogu says the suspect surrendered himself to police.

He has already been charged with murder in a Kilgoris Court.

Woman Stabbed By The Husband In Wajir, Set To Be Airlifted To Nairobi For Treatment

A man stabbed his wife in the cheek, striking a bone, in a family dispute at Khorof Harar, Wajir county, on Wednesday evening.

According to The Star, she was then rushed to  Wajir General Hospital but she is to be airlifted to Kenyatta National Hospital, Nairobi as they could not remove the knife from Fatuma Ibrahim’s cheek as this would likely result in complications.

They said chances were that the complications would endanger the life of the 32-year-old woman stabbed by her husband Mohamed Deeq.

In an attempt at mediation before the stabbing, Deeq’s brother had confiscated knives and gone to a police station to seek assistance.

The police and medics secured Ibrahim an ambulance in which she was rushed to the hospital.Women turned up in large numbers in Ibrahim’s support lampooned the government for ignoring their rights.

“The rights of women must be upheld to prevent attacks by these beasts. We want the government to be serious about gender-based violence,” said one identified as Sahara Keynan.

Wajir East OCPD Benson Makumbi said Deeq was placed in police custody and will be arraigned in court on Friday.

Things women do that drive men up the wall

Does your woman say or do things that just drive you nuts? She never seems to shut up during an argument and believes she is always right?

Maina Kageni received a call during the morning conversation from a man who says that women are very difficult to deal with. He says in case of a domestic problem, the women do not know how to resolve it peacefully.

She will shout at you and in extreme cases turn violent. He says that women need to practice control especially when talking to their men.

Ladies, what are you doing wrong that is pissing off your men? Are you a woman who drives your man up the wall?

Listen to the interesting discussion that followed

Interesting responses from Facebook

Fredrick Asamoah Jyan Horrace: Wives: Your husband’s greatest need is to be respected. If asked to choose between being loved and being respected, your husband would rather be respected than be loved. In fact when you respect your husband he feels loved. The best way into your husband’s heart is through respect. If every wicked woman knows this, one wonders why godly women don’t get it. Have you ever wondered why a man would leave the comfort of his beautiful home to be with a lowly woman in a lowly place? Respect and honor! Sadly the same man you disrespect in your own home is being honored and respected by other women at work

Churchil Omondi: we should let our women be women, our duty is to love them unconditionaly…mnacomplain nini?

Kennedy Kinoti: silence is a very strong weapon,tool and very vital ingredient in any relationship

Maclus Murimi: Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to see a man’s character give him power

Lucy Kamene Nathan: Maina before a woman attacks a man huwa amecram everything atasema.huwa ni kitu inakuwanga ready for delivery Kama burger king.when u order for her words anakuwa na information of delivery.hata Mimi today asubuhi I have been cramming how to attack a certain guy makanga Wa rongai.he insulted mi naringa na matiti mbili je ningepewa Kama za ubwa kumi ningefanyaje?now kesho namtaimia kwa bus stop.watu single huwa tunabishana tu na anyone.so we have answers to all the questions n we are always right even now I am right on this comment.so guys its always advisable to kip ya mouth shut when in such a state.juu utakumbushwa mpaka zile za kabla hamjaowana women never forget.they just kip revising.

Sharp rise in domestic violence cases

A man allegedly beat the mother of his child black and blue leaving her in critical condition after returning home from a drinking spree and accused her of neglecting their child.

Ruth Jakii, 26 who was admitted at Nairobi Women’s Hospital is accusing Alphonse Kambu, a UN Employee of inflicting the injuries on her. It is alleged that Alphonse made his way to hospital and threatened Ruth saying that nothing would happen to him since he had immunity.

“Why are our men becoming increasingly violent?” A very concerned Maina Kageni posed this question to our listeners during the morning conversation.

Listen to the interesting views from some of our callers

Ruth’s story elicited mixed reactions from Facebook with most people condemning violence. Here are top comments from Facebook

Jo Joan: Only a coward who questions his manhood or has inferiority complex would raise a hand to hit or rape a woman. A real man walks away or ends a toxic relationship period.

Kennedy Kinoti: some men suffer from inferiority complex and most of those who beat women are not fathers but just sperm donors .those men who beat ladies style up what shall it profit you if you end up in jail? this reminds me of the song,”ten commandments from a man given to a woman through the inspiration of i Prince buster” this song is what many men listen to and end up treating their ladies badly.

Eunice Lisababy: If u can’t love her in peace then live her in peace

Paulata Paul: That guy is not a man period!

Tony Ndegwa: At this era maina watu bado wanapigana? That man is a cowardd for your information. mwanaaume yeyote who raises his hand to a woman, He is SIILY, PRIMITIVE, and USELESS. Kama he is a man enough si atoke inje tupane nayeye. 

MITM: Do not be fooled by their tears; Women lie all the time, says Mwalimu King’ang’i

During the morning conversation, Mwalimu King’ang’i accused Maina of being too gullible because he empathizes too much with his callers and even offers help to those in distress.

The conversation stemmed from a call yesterday, from a woman whose story was simply heartbreaking.  She claimed that her husband was violent and that the last time he beat her, he went to the extent of inserting a bottle in her private parts saying that the men she sleeps with wouldn’t want her after that.

What made the case even worse was the fact that this husband neither pays rent nor provides for their 2-year-old daughter; but still will not let his wife go to work.

King’ang’i was of the opinion that the caller could have been lying and that Maina shouldn’t believe everything a woman tells him just because she shed a few tears.

Listen to the discussion below

The women and men on Facebook were not so pleased with Mwalimu King’ang’i for saying that a victim of domestic violence was lying. Here’s what they had to say.

Terah Abudiaby: Maina a woman rarely lies….I grew up seeing my mother go through this and I believe in a woman’s tears when it comes to domestic violence ….it is there and it is real……..

JHope Wankhim: A man can be so heartless when he is broke, he sees his wife or his girlfriend(if not married yet) as a burden and hence pours all his bitterness to her, Then when he gets a good job and earns some good salary he forgets the woman who has been with standing his craziness and humiliation all that time, see her as a nobody and gets a new catch.Men’ why do you behave like this????.

Pato Ndegwa Maina if many people here r criticising you for doing good remember you can’t please everyone,yesterday just outside our workplace a woman collapsed with baby on her back luckily she didn’t fell with her back,we did first aid to n provided some food 4 her,after she get well said she going all around looking 4 kibarua ya kuosha manguo,her husband chased her away from Huruma with 5 month yr old kid,some men r just like animals,wen we called her hazi akadai hamjui na ako wife mwingine.may help women of this world.

Anne Kironji: Ati lying r u for real? Domestic violence is real and it ain’t easy for a woman. Men who beat women should grow up cz its high time for them to….

Priceless King Peter Maina: Maina we should agree that anyone can lie it is human nature to do so but also like you are saying it breaks all logic why someone will call to give some personal information like that knowing full well you can react and what to help her. In my opinion, its all in the way you react to what she says that is the only way u will know if she is truthful or not.

“My violent husband paraded me naked in-front of our kids and house-help before beating me up,” woman confesses

Picture this…Your husband bans you from listening to radio or watching TV at home, beats you up in the presence of your children, accuses you of being a lesbian if you confide in your lady friends. He also labels you as promiscuous if you talk to your male friends and you can’t disclose your situation to your/his family because he’s threatened to kill you if you do so. It has been 16-years in this relationship…what would you do?

Maina Kageni received this depressing call from the lady above during the morning conversation with Mwalimu King’ang’i. He was seeking answers from Classic 105 listeners on what is the right course of action in such a scenario and the reactions were unbelievable.

From some messages saying that the woman must have done something to deserve the beating, to some saying that violence is unacceptable.

Ole Kasitet Jr. : Its not too late for that woman to leave that idiot n look for her own life…wanaume wengine wangeoa punda wapigane mateke, nkt!!!

Namboka Wa Odero: I had one like that. Mine was even worse coz being an orphan I dint know where to start especially with 2 kids. He used that to the maximum advantage of his abuse. I ran and will never turn back. 7 years down the line, I wouldn’t hesitate to encourage any woman in such a situation to take off. It may seem as a dead end to start over again but look at me now 7 yrs, 2 kids and being a family woman am now getting ready to walk down the aisle again.

Cate Mimi: Yawa gimme a break,should she wait to leave in a coffin or worse a body bag?16 years?????Sometimes you’re patient to a fault.Was she waiting for Maina to tell her to walk the hell out like a decade ago?Somebody give me lemon water!!!Kwani women waliacha akili home wakiolewa??eti till death do us part.Oh yes but lets define “death” first.That term is relative believe me.Ni hayo Tu kwa sasa

Susan Catherine Keter: I will give my honest opinion about this. I would really want to understand where this woman is coming from. Was she raised in a home where violence was normal? What values were instilled in her from a young age; that she is useless and voiceless coz she is a woman? What made her become who she is such that she accepts to be treated like dirt and she does not stand up for herself?

Sylvia Atieno: Maina i heard that lady callin u n it was sad n she made me cry..its so sad n she desperately need help…im on your side maina in helpin this lady…do watever it takes to take her out of that home with her kids….until u bkam a victim ul never know the pain

We received yet another depressing call from a woman who says that her violent husband brought her a knife, a rope and hot water and asked her to choose how she would want to die

Your Guide To Exiting An Abusive Relationship, 7 Tips

Almost all of us can relate to domestic violences stories because we have either been that woman in an abusive relationship, our mother’s have been there or someone close to us has gone through it. It is not as easy as many like to presume to walk out on such a relationship. Most often than not women will hang on because of financial desperation, some are afraid of ridicule, others are too afraid of their violent men while some have been brainwashed to believe they are not good enough.

No woman however should ever sit around in a violent marriage and hope that one day the man will change. If you are looking for an exit plan and do not know where to start, here are some tips

1. Contact the domestic violence centres/hotline
Centre for Rehabilitation of Abused Women (CREAW) is one such organization that helps victims of domestic violence. Contacting such a centre helps you gets ideas on the steps to take towards reporting such crimes and leaving that relationship. They offer counselling services and help victims leave abusive relationships.

2. Seek Medical Attention on all injuries
Getting hospital documentation for every injury caused to you is important as it acts as evidence against your abuser. Keep the medical records afterwards because they will help you when lodging a case.

3. Collect evidence of the abuse
If your man has been making threats to you make recordings of those threats, take photos of that black eye he caused in the last beating. Also keep all medical files they are good evidence

4. Reach out for help from friends
A friend is the similar situation as you may not be the best bet to get advice from but a sober friend who doesn’t condone violence. Be careful whom you confide in lest they go informing your abuser.  It will help keep your mind sane and give you an insight on the direction to take. Most domestic violence victims will often suffer in silence, yet talking to someone might actually present a solution.

5. Make savings
Some victims of domestic violence will often wonder how will i survive without money if i leave this man and the first step is putting money aside for your escape plan. It may take longer than expected especially if you do not have a job. If the violence persists before you can save enough, borrow from a trustworthy friend.

6. Master Your Abuser’s Schedule
You wouldn’t want to be caught while sneaking out all the suitcases and children so mastering the schedule to your abuser is key. It gives you an idea on the safe times to leave.

7. Look for a secure place to stay
You wouldn’t want your abuser trailing you after exiting and therefore finding a secure location is key, whether it means locating towns and finding a new job to start a fresh just do it. Also the evidence you collected while in the relationship comes in handy and would be used for collecting a restraining order and reporting the matter to the authorities