Couples who do chores together are happier, fight less and have better sex lives, according to new research.
Americans spend an average of 664 hours doing household work each year, and women spend about an hour more each day tidying up than men do.
Equal sharing of the burden of chores is becoming more common, however, and research suggests that as it does women are feeling less put upon and more in the mood.
What’s more, sex therapist Dr Ian Kerner advises that doing housework together can make the chores go quicker, build communications with your partner and even turn make the dish-washing steamy.
Juvenile as it may seem, fighting over housework was the primary cause of divorce for a full quarter of Americans, according to a survey published earlier this year.
And, apparently, who does the dishes is the biggest cause for quarrel for women.
Researchers from three universities broke down how more than 600 couples divvy up chores, and how satisfied they were in their relationships and sex lives.
Women who felt like they washed the lion’s share of the dishes were more likely be unhappy with their partners.
When it comes to house work, we have come along way toward equality, and appear to be better for it.
Research on chore habits using data from the 1980s and 1990s actually suggested that couples who took more traditional household roles were happier, but a newer survey found that both partners are better off when the duties are split.
‘A lot of today’s relationships are sort of egalitarian and having a partner who helps out with chores is just about having a collaborative, egalitarian relationship, which is what many of expect,’ says Dr Kerner.
But overall, who does the housework means a lot more to women than it does to men.
Division of at-home labor did not predict much about how men felt about their relationships, but having to spend more time at the kitchen sink seems to really put a damper on women’s sex drives.
The survey did not ask women why dishes were such a sore subject for them, but a few factors may be at play.
Kenyans are at home for a mini public holiday due to the repeat of presidential elections that are supposed to take place today.
Well, some couples may end up divorcing or even boring each other because of one thing or another especially in the house.
Politics and TV remote could be some of the reasons enmity will emerge especially if the two of you are in different political parties.
While relationships may fall apart for other reasons, here are 6 ways to ward off boredom in a relationship.
Try new or old things in the bedroom
Maybe the sex has gone stale or absent. Find sometime with bae and try something new. Explore your kinkier sides or do something you both have never done before and see how you react to it.
Alternatively, you can also do what you used to do in your honeymoon phase. Relive the golden times until they become the rote. Mix it up and remember not to talk about politics in the bedroom.
Go on adventures
Take time to go to a place you’ve always wanted to visit. Visit some of the places that have been recommended for couples. Or you could go on a daring trip where you both try something you’ve never done before and remember to be safe.
When you live and breathe each other, it can become smothering for you or your partner. If you have your own thing going on besides your kids, or work, then you can recharge yourself before finally meeting at the end of your day. Look for comedy movies and watch together to forget about the tension in the country.
Keep negativity out
Reaffirm yourselves in what made you fall in love in the first place and what keeps the fire blazing. Count your blessings, pray together and remember to be positive and to listen to each other.
Just chat with each other. You do it all the time with your friends and those don’t have a chance of fizzling out, just chat with bae. Talk about the goals you have together and what you plan for your children. Remember the point is avoid politics no matter how you want to talk about it.
Put yourselves first
Ensure that considerations are made for yourselves before anything happens. How will politics affect your relationship? How does your partner feel about it? Always understand each other and ensure that you still have a way to connect regardless of anything.
Many couples celebrate their wedding day with family and friends eating, dancing and dining together ad it’s the way it has always been.
However a couple in Syria chose to celebrate their nuptials by inviting 4,000 refugees to share their big day with them.
Fethullah Üzümcüoğlu and Esra Polat married in the southern Turkish city of Kilis and offered all the food intended for their wedding party to displaced families living in poverty nearby.
Traditionally Turkish weddings last about three days culminating in a huge banquet on the final night.
The newlyweds chose to donate all their families savings for the party to share their celebrations with refugees living on the Syrian border.
The generous idea came from groom’s father, Ali Üzümcüoğlu who shared it with his son.
He says that he’s happy his son accepted it and that they started their new happy journey with such a selfless action.
In total, there are four million Syrian refugees who had fled the country in what the UN described as the worst crisis of its kind in a generation.
Almost eight million people are displaced within the country, according to the UN.
Bride Esra was delighted to be able to share her special day with those in need and says that she was shocked by the idea but afterwards I was won over by it and had such a wonderful experience sharing with people in need.
Will weight loss work out better if it is tackled alone or together as a couple? And how can couples embark on a healthy habits lifestyle together? These are questions anyone who’s looking to slim down asks. And we have answers!
Here are four easy tips for couples looking to loose weight together:
1. Communicate. And do it well
Get started, find a time to talk about the deeper values of going on a diet. Mistrust is easily created if thoughts like these come up: He wants to attract a new mate. She will make me change my hamburgers and quit drinking beer, and I will hate it.
A conversation about losing weight should, at first, be about inner values. What are the main reasons for losing weight? To live long to be great grandparents one day? To eat in a way that is sustainable for the planet? To set a good example for the kids? Agree on your goals first before discussing the way to get there.
2. Start small
It is a good idea to make initial change where it is easy. One partner might want to try out a new juicer or breakfast smoothie, while the other might prefer going to the local tennis club to pick up some class schedules. Small changes are the best way to start, leaving room for small corrections along the way.
3. Find balance and maintain it
There are just as many weight loss motivators in the world as there are diets. But it’s important to connect with your own inner desire to be well.
Who are your role models? What’s important to you? What are you obstacles? Now, compare them to your partner’s and create balance.
4. Focus on your attitude
A positive attitude goes along with positive mental, emotional and physical health. Setbacks come up, but it’s how you handle them that’s important. Stay positive (with an attitude of joyful discovery) and your parter will too!
Working in Hollywood and maintaining a relationship can be tough, however some strong couples get around the challenges by combining the two. One great examples are Team Downey, the powerhouse partnership of Hollywood star Robert Downey Jr. and his successful producer wife, Susan.
The two have come together to form their own production company called Team Downey and to celebrate the launch of Team Downey’s first film, The Judge, out on Blu-ray and DVD on 2nd March, we’ve taken a look at some of the industries other ultimate power couples.
Robert Downy Jr and Susan Downey
After meeting on the set of 2003 thriller Gothika, which Susan was producing, the couple went on to make five more movies together before launching their own production company Team Downey.
Susan has said of their collaboration for The Judge, “We were really fortunate to get The Judge for the first Team Downey project. Robert and I had already made like six movies together. We decided that if we’re going to keep doing this and enjoying ourselves, we had to do something more official”
Prior to Team Downey, Susan worked at Silver Pictures, which produced Kiss Kiss Bang Bang and Sherlock Holmes, both of which starred Robert in the lead role.
The couple have been described by director Guy Richie as ‘the greatest illustration of a symbiotic marriage that I’ve ever seen. It’s a real yin and yang’. The pair has two children together and live in Malibu.
Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith
Will Smith met Jada Pinkett in 1995 when she auditioned for the role of his girlfriend on The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. Despite not getting the part, they became firm friends and after time hanging out, their friendship developed into love.
Together, the couple are founding partners of entertainment company Overbrook Entertainment and have gone on to produce movies including Hitch, I Am Legend, The Pursuit of Happyness and Karate Kid, all starring Will himself with their son Jaden also taking lead roles. The couple has two kids, Jaden and Willow Smith, turning their powerhouse partnership to one of Hollywood’s most successful families.
Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie
One of the most well-documented showbiz relationships in decades, Brad and Angelina are a true example of how an on-screen relationship can spark feelings off-screen too.
After starring together in spy Mr & Mrs Smith the couple have gone off to support each other on-screen and behind the cameras, with Jolie writing, directing and also starring alongside Pitt in upcoming drama By the Sea. Not only do the couple have incredible Hollywood careers, but as a pair are parents to six children. They made fans across the globe very happy when they married in 2014, with Jolie unveiling her unique wedding dress designed by the kids.
Ryan Gosling & Eva Mendes
One of Hollywood’s most fiercely private couples, Eva and Ryan are said to have met on the set of The Place beyond the Pines, a film in which they played lovers with a new born child. Four years on, the couple are parents to a child of their own, named Esmerelda.
The pair have also worked together on a second project, as Gosling is making his directorial debut with Lost River. Gosling is in the director’s chair and has penned the screenplay, while Mendes is part of an all-star cast taking on the role of Cat.
Ben Affleck & Jennifer Garner
They met when filming Pearl Harbour, but are said to have fallen in love on the set of super-hero movie Daredevil. Ben and Jen were married just a year after their first public appearance as a couple. The pair has three children together, two daughters Violet and Seraphina and son, Samuel.
There was drama at Moi Hospital mortuary in Voi sub-county when a grieving mother went berserk after finding her estranged husband attempting to sneak a coffin intended for their son’s remains from the mortuary.
The Tuesday afternoon drama momentarily paralysed activities at the mortuary as Perine Ogot, the child’s mother made a scene after she found her husband and his friends carrying an empty coffin pretending there was a body inside.
The discovery drove the mother wild as she screamed and threatened her husband and his friends who fled from the scene.
Speaking to KNA at the mortuary on Tuesay, Ogot accused her husband of attempting to take over the burial plans for their 8-years – old son yet he had failed to provide for the family for the past three years.
She claimed that he had secretly conspired to sneak the body out from the mortuary so that he can bury it quickly to avoid questions on where he had been when the child had been struggling with the chronic pneumonia that killed him.
“He cannot come here and attempt to sneak the body of our child out of the mortuary yet he has been gone for three years. He has been living large in Mombasa and neglected our son when he was alive. He should not be concerned now that he is dead,” said the teary mother.
According to the mother, the husband had further planned to take the body for burial at a public cemetery. He had acquired a burial permit and had a grave dug at the Voi public cemetery but these plans were opposed by the mother on the grounds that the family had a home where their children should be buried.
“We can’t just go and bury our son at a public cemetery amongst strangers as if he has no home. We have a home and land where he can rest in peace,” the mother stated.
Her husband had reportedly attempted to get child’s body, but was however informed by morgue attendants that the mother had ordered that the body not be released.
In a bizarre move, the husband’s friends went into the morgue and emerged carrying out a coffin that appeared to have a body.
Ogot and her two brothers blocked the coffin and demanded to see the body inside. In the process of pushing and shoving, the coffin collided against a car door and tumbled on the ground revealing an empty interior.
The women started wailing and screaming forcing the men to flee from the scene leaving two of their colleagues to collect the coffin before hightailing out of the mortuary compound.
The driver for the vehicle hired to carry the body drove off hastily insisting he would not carry the body for fear of a curse.
“They are mocking my dead son by attempting to fool us that they are concerned about him now that he is gone,” said the distraught mother as other women attempted to comfort her.
She further alleged that the dead child had been crying as he lay in the morgue, lifeless for three days saying it was an indicator that he is unhappy with the tug-of-war between the parents.
“I have seen him and tears are still coming out of his eyes. He is very unhappy with how he is being treated ,” she alleged.
She added that the body will remain in the mortuary until the husband agreed to have their son buried at their ancestral home in Werugha, Wundanyi sub-county.
Men are often the first to say “I love you” in a relationship. Almost 65 per cent of people think it’s women who first say the words, a US study found. What a man or woman thinks when they hear “I love you” depends on when the words are said.
Men don’t just say the words “I love you” first, they think them first. Six weeks before women do, in fact. It’s a finding that goes against most people’s intuition. When asked, almost 85 per cent of people predict that women are the first to think they’re in love. In 70 per cent of current relationships, it’s the man who first puts their words where their thoughts are when the time comes to declare their love, the study published in The Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found.
Almost 89 per cent of people think women are happier than men to hear the words “I love you”. But how a man or woman feels about their partner’s love actually depends on whether they’ve had sex yet in the relationship, researchers found.
Men who hear “I love you” in a pre-sex relationship feel a lot happier than women do. But that’s only true for men with short term sex on the brain, not those looking for a committed long-term relationship. After a couple’s already had sex, women are a little happier than men to hear the words “I love you”.
“I love you” means different things to men and women, the studies showed. Men are more likely to think that when a woman says she’s in love, it’s because she’s hoping for a committed relationship. When a woman hears the words “I love you”, there’s more of a chance she thinks her partner’s only looking for sex.
Under unclear circumstances a Christian couple was beaten to death by a Muslim mob in Pakistan and then their bodies were set afire after they allegedly desecrated the Quran, police said.
The attack in the eastern Punjab province town of Kot Radha Kishan on Tuesday is the latest targeting minorities in Pakistan who allegedly committed blasphemy.
“The incident of desecration of the holy Koran took place in the area and today the mob first beat the couple and later set their bodies on fire at a brick kiln that’s according to the local police station official Bin Yameen who told the AFP news agency.
A contradictory report by the Pakistani Dunya news network says the couple were killed after laying sand on a grave while The News International claim the attack happened after the owner of the kiln asked they pay back a cash advance.
Forty-two people have been arrested in connection with the killings.
Police tried to save the couple, but the angry crowd was too large.
Whether you’re loving the single life or desperately seeking someone, these are the phrases that all single people are sick of hearing.
He’s Out There
Unless you can physically point to his location, please spare single people this particular pep talk. You Married Yet?
You: I just finished my master’s degree ,spent the summer in Paris and beat my personal best in last weekend’s 5K
Your Older Relative: Yeah, but are you married yet? Why Are You Still Single?
This is supposed to be a compliment about how you’re so awesome it’s amazing someone hasn’t snapped you up yet. But more often than not it just sends you into an existential crisis like… Wait. Why am I still? Don’t You Want Kids?
A not-so-subtle reminder that I’m getting old? Why thank you. How did you know this is exactly what I needed right now? You’re Not A Lesbian, Are You?
Trust us, if switching teams were that simple we’d have given it a try. Come Back Home
Stay single too long in a conservative family and they’ll try to turn you into a spinster. Welcome to a life of running errands for your grandmother and watching your nieces and nephews. You’re Too Picky
Translation: maybe it’s time to settle? Because for some people it’s better to be together and sort of unhappy than alone and feeling perfectly fine. Where Are My Grandbabies?
You know that’s not a good enough reason for me to get married, right mom?