This Is The Mpango Wa Kando Rule Book

“Mpango wa kando”, the now popular phrase in reference to a clandestine affair with a married person has become common place. With relationships today becoming more of a joke, many people, both men and women, are now finding themselves “sharing” partners.

The fact that we openly acknowledge the existence of these relationships in society means that such unions require some form of regulation.

Below we share some rules that you need to follow as a mpango wa kando, whether male or female.

  1. Do not call your married partner when they are at home with their spouse.
  2. You have no business calling his wife AT ALL and if she calls you, well depending on her approach, have a cordial conversation without calling each other names.
  3. In reference to number two, should she choose to insult you, it is wise that you hang up and not engage her. Not even via text or whatsapp.
  4. Do not get pregnant, because, one, The man might scatter and you will be left hanging or two he might stick around but remember the time will be divided between two homes meaning he might not be around when you need him.
  5. Always have an exit plan because chances are they will not leave your partner for you.
  6. Don’t ever cry/fight for them, that’s not your work or your business.
  7. Your relationship is mainly based on sex and other material things so do not get attached for whatever reason.
  8. If they buy you something pricey make sure the certificate, license or whatever the legal framework needed is under your name not theirs. Should anything happen to the relationship you can keep it and keep the papers too.
  9. You shall NEVER EVER talk about his wife or family no matter how bad he portrays them, just listen and nod and always keep a neutral view…Never take sides.
  10. You shall never show up at their house, place of work or business for whatever reason unless they ask you to.
  11. Always stick to your position, don’t try to play wife there’s already one and it’s not you accept it.

Reasons why she likes being a mistress

Nowaday alot of people have made it look like it’s normal to have side relationships.

Many women claim that there are no good men to settle with and hence the clandestine arrangements.

Well, we  take a look as to why some women are comfortable with this arrangement.

Because She Allows It – I always say that if you accept less than you will get less. Many who are side chicks simply allow themselves to be put into this category. They accept the game this man runs on them even when they say they want better than this. If she isn’t aware of the other woman then that is different. Plenty women are aware of the main chick and still choose to go along with the situation. The reality is that many side chicks will eventually if not initially want the top spot and most will never get it.

Side Chick Benefits – Let’s face it, some guys give a great benefits package to their mistress. Lavish gifts, bills paid, and all the two minute sex sessions she could dream of. For many women this is worth the trade-off of not being the main girl. We can discuss whether this is right or wrong but I’m not getting in to that today. The benefits that the woman will receive including having more flexibility on when she does and does not want to deal with this man makes this arrangement work in her mind. She isn’t truly into him either so for her it’s less hassle and more fun as far as she is concerned.

She Fears A Real Relationship – The truth is our world is filled with damaged and hurt individuals. The disappointments in love and relationships have caused many people to operate with walls up. For some, what better wall to protect yourself than knowingly not being the only woman in that man’s life. Some women figure being the side chick is safer for their heart and emotions, while still providing them companionship at some level. Of course this is risky business because eventually many still develop an unhealthy attachment. Yet and still this situation is appealing to some who think they are “protecting themselves”.

She Only Offers Good Looks & Sex –  Unfortunately many women have yet to reach their potential. They haven’t evolved as a woman and they simply get by on great looks and sex. For a lot of men, this is all they want in their side chick, so this woman is a perfect fit. If she wants to truly hold a higher position in a man’s life she then you has to provide much more value than this. For some guys this may be enough to get their top spot but she likely won’t be able to maintain it. A woman has to bring more to the table or be prepared to only get another woman’s sloppy seconds.

She Gets A High From Dealing With Another Woman’s Man – Obviously there is a deeper rooted issue here but at the surface this is an ego boost to many. She likes the fact that she has the next girl’s man running after her. She enjoys doing something that others view as wrong (forbidden fruit). There may be a bitterness factor at play because she has been burned and hurt in the past so this makes her feel like she is in control. It’s just a thrill for her and she really isn’t ready or willing to embrace something with real substance and effort (see #3).

He Can’t Bring Her Home To His Mother

Just because a man wants to have sex with a woman, that doesn’t mean he can ever see himself being with that woman. She will only be his side chick because of that fact and because he knows his family would not accept her as anything more. The specific reasons why can vary with each person and family. Ultimately she provides enough benefits to keep around but that man has to give his family a main chick they can embrace.

She Doesn’t Value Herself –  Low self-esteem can drive people to deal with a lot less than what they deserve, and in this case accept the role of being a side chick. She may have bought into the lie that she can’t do better than this man. That she should appreciate the left over scraps that he feeds her rather than embrace that she deserves receiving a full meal of a man. Maybe she started off not knowing and after it was revealed she found it hard to walk away. Knowing and embracing her worth would help her find the strength to not accept this situation that she knows she is not happy with. This woman should not let that man set her value. She has to realize she is worth much more than this.

Governor found in a compromising situation with a clandestine

A governor from Nyanza is on the spot over claims that he has insatiable appetite for women.

Last Sunday there was commotion in his office when he instructed one of his secretaries to report to work at about 6pm ostensibly to print him some documents.

Fearing for her job, the hapless secretary, who doubles up as ‘Mpango wa Kando”, arrived in the office but was shocked to realise it was not work after all.

The evening was, however, ruined when the governor’s other clande was chauffeured in to honour an earlier date and found the governor in a compromising situation!