Co-wives? Lessons every man should borrow from John De Mathew -List

Sarafina Wairimu and Caroline Waithira, wives to the late Mugithi Maestro John De Mathew have proven it is possible to co-wives without fights.

Below are a few tips that worked for them that other men can pick from.

1. Introduce them to each other

One thing that makes polygamy effective is introducing them to each other, whether they get along or not they will at least know they are not the only ones.

Gone are the days when co-wives appear during burials.

 Speaking about her experience Caroline said that De Mathew gave her an ultimatum.

‘He called me one day and told me he wanted me to meet his first wife. I was reluctant but he told me if I refused I could not continue living with him.’

2. Do not bad mouth one wife to the other

No matter how bad things might get, do not bad mouth your first wive to your second wife. Just sort your issues or talk it out with someone else.

Photos of the two widows John De Mathew has left behind

3. Do not teach the kids to be enemies

Kids have a mind of their own, so let them decide on their own if they want to be friends or not.

Sarafina, De Mathew’s first wife said that he never favoured the kids.

‘He would take our daughter shiku then pass by Caroline’s house and pick his son and take them out together.’

4. Let them create their own rapport

The temptation to want to force your wives on each other might be high but let them find their own way towards each other.

Speaking about their relationship Caroline, De Mathew’s second wife said that Sarafina reached out to her and that helped them be friends

‘She started texting how I was doing, before long we would bump into each other at the supermarket randomly,after that we started taking our kids for outings together.’

Sarafina added,

‘We became such good friends that our husband started becoming afraid of the friendship.’

‘He loved me to the end’ Read touching tribute from De Mathews 1st wife

 5. Love them equally

Loving one woman more than the other and showing it is a recipe for disaster.

According to De Mathew’s wives, he loved them equally

Caroline said,

 ‘When he was at Sarafina’s place he would give her shopping money for both of us and she would send it to me via Mpesa.

If she was at my place he would do the same , not once did he favour one of us more than the other.’

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Photos of the two widows John De Mathew has left behind

John De Mathew loved to sing about love but most importantly he lived true to most of his lyrical content. He showed his love to his 2 wives and 7 kids.

Among DeMathew’s two wives is Caroline Waithira and Sarafina Wairimu.

Carol has featured in De Mathews song ‘Wendo Umaga Kuraya’ which means ‘Love Comes from Far’.

The song highlights how the couple met and how they ended up married.

‘He loved me to the end’ Read touching tribute from De Mathews 1st wife

De-wife-3

According to the song Carol had gone for a concert in which De Mathew was performing only for her to be thrown out by a guard.

De Mathew intervened and requested her to join his table, as they say, the rest is history.

He passed away on Sunday after his car rammed into the back of a lorry near Blue Post Hotel,Thika. Reports indicate he was pronounced dead on arrival at Thika Nursing Home.

‘Dad has finished the race,’ Read John De Mathews’ moving tribute from his kids

Below are photos of Caroline, DeMathews’ second wife and Sarafina Wairimu his first wife.

John De Mathews wives
John De Mathew’s wives
De Mathew and wife
De Mathew and wife

De-wife-1-1 De-wife-2 De-wife-3

Going by the above photos it is evident that DeMathew was a man with a big heart and a lot of love to share.

His remains are at Kenyatta University mortuary awaiting burial at a later date as the family is still coming to terms with his death.

Below is the song which De Mathew narrates how he met with his wife

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‘I was living every woman’s dreams,’ John De Mathew’s 2nd wife pays tribute

Caroline Waithira the second wife to the late John De Mathew eulogized him as a loving, supportive, God-fearing man during his funeral.

De Mathew who passed away from a road accident near blue post was among Kenya’s most celebrated Mugithi artistes.

Paying tribute to her husband Carol said

I had the opportunity and rare privilege of being the wife and partner of the wonderful, loving, kind and God-fearing man. Life could not have been better than that because I was living every woman’s dreams.

‘He loved me to the end’ Read touching tribute from De Mathews 1st wife

De-wife-2

Carol said that having De Mathew for a husband was a blessing.

The best of everything was at my disposal whether I asked for it or not. We had our problems like every family but making up and resolving our issues was magical.

I was blessed with the best husband and father to my children and his name was John Ng’ang’a Mwangi AKA John De- Mathew. My husband was such a wonderful man.

I’m not sure I can really express just how much I will miss him. Not only was he a wonderful husband, but a wonderful father, musician, best friend, colleague …and so much more.

‘Dad has finished the race,’ Read John De Mathews’ moving tribute from his kids

Caroline praised her late husband for being her soul mate and inspiration against all odds.

John’s ability to make everyone feel comfortable, secure and loved were his greatest strengths- He was a man of the people. For all the time we have been together, I look back over those joyful moments with so much happiness.

He was my soul mate and my inspiration – my steadfast rock that helped me through thick and thin. John supported and loved us all, and was always there to help navigate through life’s challenges.

John may be in heaven now, but I know he is looking down at us with a big smile on his face saying, “Forge ahead – make the best of life – and I’ll see you soon.

 

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‘Dad has finished the race,’ Read John De Mathews’ moving tribute from his kids

Kenya’s music icon John DeMathew has been laid to rest today at his Gatanga home,in an event attended by thousands of Kenyans from all walks of life.

He died in a tragic road accident on August 18 when his car rammed into the back of a lorry along Thika Road.

De Mathew is survived by two widows; Sarafina Wairimu John and Caroline Waithira John and his seven children; Jane Waithira, Everlyne Wanjiku, Chrissp Kamau, Stacy Wanjiku, Lenny Ng’ang’a, Tyresse Thiiru and Wayne Mathew Ng’ang’a Junior.

Today during the burial service, they paid tribute to their dad, whom they view as a superhero.

They said in their tribute, “Dads are someone to look up to, someone to follow, someone to admire, someone to be proud of and someone to brag about, someone to hold, someone to learn from and someone to respect, someone to listen to and someone to talk to, someone to try and impress and, someone, most of all, with whom to share everything this wonderful life has to offer.

‘He loved me to the end’ Read touching tribute from De Mathews 1st wife

John De Mathews son
John De Mathews son

‘Goodbye! My dear sweet husband,’ John DeMathew’s wife pays tribute

We are incredibly grateful and happy that we can stand here today and tell you that we have had all this and much, much more with our Dad. We have been blessed to have had the great De- Mathew as our Dad.

Dad, we love you for an infinite number of reasons.

We feel so blessed to have you as our father and we are thankful for the wonderful life you have given us.

We celebrate you: a magnificent man, a loyal, loving husband, a devoted father, and a true friend.

Please know that our list of gratitude is endless and will continue to grow with each passing day.

He loved me to the end’ Read touching tribute from De Mathews 1st wife

Despite not being there the kids praised the late for being a good provider,and a source of security for them.

Thank you for providing us with a never-ending sense of physical safety and emotional security whenever we are with you. 

Thank you for showing us what is means to be a good man, a great Musician, an extraordinary husband, and an outstanding father.

To say we loved my Dad would be an understatement – and to say we are going to miss him would be an even greater understatement. 

Demathew mazishi 11 (1)

We love him and we will miss him – especially when his music is played – but I’m so thankful for the years God graciously gave us with him and for the knowledge that one day, because we serve the same Lord, we will see him again.

In conclusion, they signed off with a meek, “Dad has overcome. He has finished the race. We love you dad.”