Is it possible to leave a man peacefully after what he did? Maina asks


The Monday August 23 conversation was all from the mature breakup between Alfred Mutua and Lilian Nganga.

The two have declared they are still friends and hang out on his birthday on the 22nd, proving their statements true.

Maina delved in saying “ladies I need you and your two cents. we were treated to what Kenyan men celebrated last week. the parting of ways of Alfred and alot of men are asking, why can’t Kenyan women be like Lilian? when it’s over you go respectfully?”

Mwalimu told him that is a dream to expect a Kenyan woman to go without drama

“You know you need to find a way to wind down, they can’t leave peacefully hakuna haja ya kuongeza pressure, hii kitu ya kuenda mkigonganisha masufuria, hakuna haja, pole pole, slowly”

‘Love never goes away,’ Governor Alfred Mutua’s advise to young couples

Prompting Maina Kageni to open up discussion to the audience asking “ladies did you leave peacefully? Is it possible to leave a Kenyan man peacefully after what he did to you? How did you leave your ex?”

A woman told Maina that it’s possible to leave peacefully recounting her painful but necessary moment

“I left my husband and it is possible to leave peacefully. i left him because he was cheating. And when you give you’re all Maina it doesn’t matter what that guy is giving you you just leave and close your heart completely. But when you decide this is what I want to do it does not matter Maina, you just go and forget, you don’t even take him to court, if he wants to look for the children fine, if he doesn’t fine. He cheated on me for three years and I kept forgiving him but he didn’t stop. They get to know your weakness and know what buttons to push. You can be friends, just guard your heart, . I felt he was gonna change, you just feel like you are fighting for your marriage you are just here confused but at the end of the day fight for the marriage if the guy has a drinking problem, not a cheating problem, because he will forever cheat, if a man cheats on you once he will do it again, you can’t try you can’t you just leave and go and forget, honorably”


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10 things to stop doing if you’re unlucky in love


You have kissed 1000 frogs and not met the one yet.

If you feel unlucky in love, avoid doing any of these ten things:

1. Stop pitying yourself

It prevents you from finding someone else because of feelings of unworthiness. Many of us have and continue feeling this way. You are not meant to be alone.

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2. Don’t try so hard

We immediately jump back into the game with promises to do better next time. When you push yourself too hard you dont allow a genuine person to come into your life. People for your information smell a desperate person a mile off.


3. Hold no expectations

Having too many expectations of someone leads to disappointment.

Expect nothing and you’ll always be pleasantly surprised.

4. Don’t call him up

Listen sis, if a guy is done with you, let him go. Men should do the chasing, they love it..

5. Stop crying over them

Don’t waste your time crying over spilt milk. Crying over someone isn’t going to get you anywhere. Say thank you, next!!.

6. Keep some mystery

This is called TMI (too much information) A little mystery goes a long way. Keep yourself a little mysterious, that’s what keeps people’s attention.

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7. Stop blaming it on men

It’s not them. It’s you. This is all on you, because you keep going for the wrong person.

8. Stop going after the wrong guy

You may have a set mind what type of guy you like, however it is possible, you are focused on what shouldn’t be. Give another type of guy a chance.

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9. Be yourself


10. Take a chance

You may surprise yourself with how well it goes.

11. Let go babe

Weka shida chini, mikono juu. It’s not worth holding on to for all the negative energy.


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How immaturity cost Pastor Kanyari’s marriage to Betty Bayo

The reason that led to the end of pastor Victor Kanyari’s marriage to Betty Bayo has been made public.

Speaking to Word Is on Saturday, Kanyari said that they married while very young and immature.

“Betty was the best woman I have ever met but I think when we met we were both still childish, I was only 31 years.”

It is the main reason the marriage did not work because Betty was not a bad lady. She could have her perspective but the age contributed to the breakup.

Kanyari said they were not strong and grown enough to handle marriage life, but now they are mature and able to decide the best for themselves.

Many believe that the two separated after Betty realised that her husband had been running a false ministry.

“She was overcome by Pastor Kanyari’s scandalous life. The TV expose was not the main reason because she stood by me.

Kanyari would not listen to anything she told him.

“Like when she wants me to come home early, it was always a problem for me.” He says Betty was the best woman he has ever met.

Asked if he still loves Betty, Kanyari said, he cannot say yes or no.

“You cannot force love to anyone. Na ukiachwa achika. I would say, if she loves me, I love her too but if she does not, then why should I force myself to her? If you are mature enough you let things unfold themselves without forcing them to happen because it could affect both of us.” Love is a journey, and I loved her then but for now, I don’t know what her heart has.

Pastor Kanyari

Betty has finally moved on and is set to wed. Kanyari said,

“The time will for me to move on and the whole world will know but for now no hurry in Africa. I will move on when I want, let me have my good time and continue serving God,” he said.

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10 stages of a breakup we all go through


The breakup may have come as a shocker to you, and it’s important you take note of these stages of heartbreak.

You will eventually come out the side a better, stronger person, but getting there is a process and it’s one we all go through, no matter what our personal circumstances.

Stage 1: Shock/Denial.

You won’t be able to accept it at first, and will not let it known to family and friends that you’ve broken up with bae. You’re desperately hoping things will change.

Stage 2: Blinding rage.

You slowly become angry at the situation and your feeling of hopelessness. You snap at everyone and everything as a way to vent.breakup_7

Stage 3: Keeping to yourself

You become a recluse of sorts who is mourning the relationship. This is where one doesn’t see the sense in showering and all you want to do is stay in bed or sleep on the couch eating snacks.

Stage 4: Blaming yourself.

It’s normal to wonder what went wrong, and go over every single thing you did. Sure, it’s possible that you messed up, but it’s important not kick yourself while you’re already down too much.Breakup

Stage 5: Continuously crying over him

You will watch all the sad movies that will only serve to remind you of him. This is the tough part of dealing with your feelings.
Stage 6: Longing to hold him

You will stalk him on social media, and if he has not updated anything, you hop onto the feed of hi friends and relatives in the hopes of any information about him. Pining for him. Block his number and un-follow him sis, you will only continue to hurt yourself.

Stage 7: Acceptance

You realize that it’s over for good, and you’re starting to accept it. You’re no longer constantly crying and checking in on your ex.


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Selena Gomez says ‘goodbye’ to ‘toxic’ Justin Bieber


Justin and Selena’s love story and eventual fall out has now been exposed years after their breakup.

Selena Gomez released a new song from her forthcoming third album called “Lose You to Love Me.” on October 23. It’s about letting go of a toxic ex in order to learn self-love.

Fans are saying every lyric in the song screams Justin Beiber.

In the song, she talks about all the times they got back together, and being warned against him by family, plus a breakdown because of the toll the relationship was taking on her.
“This song was inspired by many things that have happened in my life since releasing my last album,” the 27-year-old said in a statement. “I want people to feel hope and to know you will come out the other side stronger and a better version of yourself.”

Bieber and Gomez dated on and off from 2010 to 2018, before splitting for good in March 2018. Bieber got back together with Hailey Baldwin, and they wed.

Here are lyrics:
“You promised the world and I fell for it / I put you first and you adored it.” The song starts off with this line, like a reference to when Gomez reconciled with Bieber in 2017, despite her mom’s concerns. According to online reports, Selena and her mum argued about this, and her mum unfollowed her on social media and was hospitalized.

“I saw the signs and I ignored it / Rose-colored glasses all distorted.” Gomez and Bieber dated on and off again from 2010 to 2018, and despite all the cheating allegations and reported fighting, Gomez still defended her decision to get back with Bieber in 2017.

“We’d always go into it blindly.” Selena repeats about all the times they got back together.

“This dance, it was killing me softly.” This also seems like a reference to their multiple breakups and how their tumultuous relationship was taking a toll on her.

“I gave my all and they all know it.” Because so much of Bieber and Gomez’s relationship was public, fans know how much Gomez really tried to make things work with Bieber.

“In two months, you replaced us / Like it was easy.” This is perhaps the most telling lyric. Gomez and Bieber broke up for good in March 2018, and two months later, rumors went viral that he had reunited with now wife Hailey Baldwin.

“I needed to lose you to love me.” Ultimately, Gomez needed to break from Bieber to learn to love herself.
“And now the chapter is closed and done.” Bieber and Baldwin held two weddign ceremonies  in 2018 and 2019, so it’s a wrap.

“And now it’s goodbye, it’s goodbye for us.” This is basically Gomez’s goodbye letter to Bieber.

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The kindest ways to breakup with someone

Being dumped can be the most hurting thing to happen to someone especially if you never expected it.

Letting go of the person you love most is  also the hardest decision for one to make.

However this can be done in more easier and honest ways without hurting anyone’s feelings.

They include;

Ask for it

This is the best and easiest way to ask for a breakup. Tell your partner the reasons as to why you want to stay away from them. When you ghost someone without their knowledge, it will be hard for them to let go especially if they were never ready for it.

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Talk about it

Texting a person or making a phone call is not the coolest way of doing it. Talk with the person face to face and give her the reasons that led to your decisions. This will make them understand you and have a positive thought about the situation.

Give your partner time 

Once you have told your partner, give them time to think about it. Let them tell you what they think about your decision. Let it be a decision made between the two of you so as to avoid hurting feelings of other people.

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Be honest

Once you have decided to part ways with someone, be honest to them. Give them honest reasons why you think the relationship will not work anymore. Let them understand that you are the reason for it all and not them to prevent them from blaming themselves. Never lie to make them better because if they know the truth later on, they will never forgive you.

Mind your words

The way you bring out the words should be in the kindest and most humble way. Avoid using harsh words to them and make them take it in a more positive way.

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Check out photos of Lillian Muli’s Ex-Husband in a new relationship

Lillian Muli’s Ex husband Moses has found love.

A photo has surfaced of him and his new love interest.

Moses Kanene had been married to TV Personality Lillian Muli for 7 years and they had a son.

We reached out to Lillian Muli who had something to say

I really don’t have any more to say, we’ve been separated seven years dear. Plus why should I deny him happiness and I found happiness too. It’s all good.

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Well here are photos of Kanene with his new bae Grace Nungari

Screenshot-from-2019-06-17-132028 (1)
Moses Kanene and Grace Nungari

Together forever: Lilian Muli reunites with her ‘Community hubby’ (Photo)

Moses Kanene and Grace Nungari

Lilian Muli spotted hanging out with ex hubby Kanene days after breaking up with ‘Community husband’ Jared (Photos)

In the interview Lillian adds that;

Moses loves his son and we are co-parenting 

Lilian Muli was once happy with Kanene, who proposed back in November 2008 at her then workplace, KTN, after four years of dating and a year after that, they exchanged vows.

Lilian Muli and Moses Kanene got married in a pink and white themed wedding affair at the Windsor Golf Club in September 2009, in the presence of their family and friends, one of the most high profile ceremonies back then.

Amid their separation, both of them have moved on finding new love in their lives.


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‘We created the best of moments together’ – Chanty to Eric Omondi


Eric Omondi and his long time girlfriend Miss Chanty have been serving us relationship goals for the longest time. But things took a turn on Tuesday May 22nd, when he announced on social media that they had broken up.

While many fans didn’t want to believe it as he has pulled many publicity stunts before, it may be a reality we have to face.

Miss Chanty has finally addressed the issue with Eric Omondi after the comedian took to his social media to share a break up message.

Have they broken up? Eric Omondi sends Chantal cryptic message

Well Miss Chanty responded to the post saying

Hello guys, I hope this finds you well i have been silent for a while…Eric and i have had long discussions for the past one month. As you all know my family lives in italy and its been really challenging for both of us.

I love eric and i will always love him and we are okay; we created the best of moments together, we shared our dreams and visions but most importantly we shared our lives. And i will always cherish every single moment. 



As i write this post i want to ask God to always protect you and your dreams until our paths meet again.

I hate goodbyes so it’s not a goodbye its more like a see you later.
I will always be here for you ANYTIME, ANYDAY



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10 steps to heal a broken heart


Leading hypnotist Paul McKenna and psychotherapist Dr Hugh Willbourn claim they can teach you to mend a broken heart. Using their unique 10 step method, you can remove emotional pain and feel free to enjoy life fully again – in days.


The problem with broken-hearted people is that they seem to be reliving their misery over and over again. If you cannot seem to break the cycle of painful memories, the chances are that you are locked into repeating dysfunctional patterns of behaviour. Your pain has become a mental habit. This habit can, and must, be broken.


Turn off the music that reminds you of your ex. Make your home look and feel different from when your loved one was around. Move the furniture.

Take up a new activity. And keep moving: exercise is the single most effective therapy for depression.

The point of these changes is to break up the old associations and give yourself a new environment for your new life. The changes you make don’t have to be permanent. Even if it is just using a different shampoo and deleting your ex’s number from the memory of your mobile, change something. Now.


The next step is to do the same thing on the inside – transform your habits of thought. In a relationship, we build up a huge array of such habits. When the love affair ends, these patterns can still be running.

To change your thinking habits, you need to understand a little more about them.



The following exercise will help you look at your circumstances from different points of view, so you gain helpful insights.

1. Think about the break-up of your relationship. What are the judgments or generalisations you have made about yourself and your ex?

2. Now think of someone you admire – a character from history or a real friend. Imagine they are watching a movie of this part of your life, and step into their shoes to watch it instead. Imagine what their comments would be.

3. Now imagine that a neutral observer is watching the movie of your life. Step into their shoes and watch it from there.

4. Notice the differences that you see from each point of view. Which ones are helpful? Which ones make you feel better? Use these perspectives to view your relationship in a new light.

People who get over difficulties well rarely see what has happened to them as a disaster. They frame it as a challenge. It is a matter of a point of view. It is not what happens to us, but how we interpret it that determines the outcome for us.


The next stage is to focus on your mental picture of your lost love. By changing how you represent your ex in your mind, you can greatly reduce or even eliminate your distress.

You must learn to control your ‘visualisation’. Every single one of us makes pictures in our imagination – and we can all learn how to change the pictures. It is important to learn to do this, because our bodies react to what we imagine in the same way that they react to what is actually happening to us. Memory and imagination affect our feelings in the same way as reality does.


1. Answer the following question. Which side of your front door is the lock on? To answer, you have had to make a mental picture of the door. You have made a visualisation.

2. Now try to imagine what your front door would look like if it was bright orange or had yellow stripes down it. Make it bigger. Move it away so that it is smaller. Move it further away and down a bit so you are looking down on it. Make it open. Change it in different ways.

3. Think about your ex now. As soon as you remember what someone looks like, you are using visualisation. What is the expression on his or her face? Observe what your ex is wearing and what he or she is doing. Where do you see the picture of them? In front of you, or to the left or the right? Is it lifesize or smaller? Is it a movie or a still image? Is it solid or transparent? Now, as you keep that image in your mind’s eye, notice the feelings that arise. Make a note of those feelings.

4. Now you could remember or imagine them differently. You can imagine you are a great film director. You can reshoot the scenes of your memory and imagination in any way you want. You can change the action, soundtrack, lighting, camera angles, framing, focus and speed. Change how you are visualising your ex and notice how it affects your feelings.

5. Bring to mind the picture you had of your ex.

6. Notice where it appears and how big it is.

7. Now drain the colour out until it looks like an old black and white picture.

8. Move the image further away until it is one-tenth of its original size.

9. Shrink it even further, right down to a little black dot.

10. Notice how your feelings have changed and compare how you feel now to the note you made earlier.



Now you are ready to tackle the central problem using the visualisation technique. Part of being heartbroken is the fact that you still feel in love. It hurts because part of you is still attached to your ex. This exercise helps that piece of you release itself.

1. List five occasions when you felt very in love with your ex. List them so you can easily call them to mind.

2. Start with the first of those memories. Play with it. Move the image away from you so that you can see yourself in the picture. Make it small.

3. Drain out the colour so it is black and white, then make it transparent. When you look at your memory like this, it will seem as if the event is happening to someone else, and the emotional intensity will be reduced still further. You are starting to re-code your memory.

4. When you have finished re-coding the first memory, do the same for the next one. Work through them until you have done all five.

5. Remember in detail five negative experiences with your expartner, where you felt very definitely put off by him or her. List the five experiences.

6. Take the least appealing memory and fully return to that moment. Try to relive it.

7. Now turn up the colour and the clarity. Make the memory as bright and clear as you can, and experience the feelings more and more strongly.

8. Go through each of the other four negative memories of your ex-partner, and relive them. Carry on until even thinking about them puts you off.

To make sure the effect sticks, do it every day for two weeks.


The next stage is to learn to understand your emotional reactions better. Your feelings of heartbreak are unlikely to disappear unless you cope with what they are trying to tell you.

An emotion is a bit like someone knocking on your door to deliver a message. If you don’t answer, it keeps knocking until you do open up.

Opening the door to your feelings means learning to understand them. This can be hard, because heartbreak is complicated by other feelings: anger, fear and shame.


You could fall into the trap of remaining convinced that your ex is the only person you could ever love. This is unlikely to be true on a planet with six billion people.

So why do you believe it? Can it be because you are desperately trying to avoid accepting that the relationship is over? Or are you afraid that the bad feelings associated with heartbreak will never go away?

That fear makes you anxious, and keeps you feeling bad for longer. The burden of your heartbreak has grown heavier, and a vicious circle has been established.


A good way of giving yourself a boost – and coping with complicated feelings – is to imagine a bright future.

1. Imagine the future as a corridor in front of you. Imagine walking down it, away from the present, towards a door.

2. Open the door, and see beyond it a world in which you have recovered from your heartbreaking relationship.

3. See what you look like, what you are wearing, where you are going, whom you are seeing.

4. Now step into this new world and into the new happy you. Imagine the whole experience from the inside, seeing what you would see, hearing what you would hear, and feeling how good and happy things are now.


• Extracted from How To Mend Your Broken Heart by Paul McKenna and Hugh Willbourn (Bantam Press, £7.99). ° 2003, Paul McKenna and Hugh Willbourn.


Woman fakes own kidnap to break up with BROKE boyfriend


A woman in China feared boyfriend would ‘get clingy’ if she asked for a breakup.

According to reports, she saw how poor he was when they visited his hometown for Chinese New Year, and after disappearing, she sent messages to the man saying she had been killed.

The 37-year-old woman, surnamed Yu, had wanted to split up with the man after finding out that he was poor, but feared he would ‘get too clingy’ and refuse, Chinese media reported.

Pretending to be her ex-husband, Yu sent threatening messages to her boyfriend, saying she had been killed and her body had been thrown into a lake in Wuhan city, Hubei province.

The boyfriend called police and they eventually found her in a motel room, unhurt.

The 36-year-old boyfriend, surnamed Lin, alerted local police after receiving the messages, Wuhan Evening News reported on Tuesday.

Lin said his girlfriend disappeared from their dormitory at the Huangpi Jiahai Industrial Park where they worked on the night of February 21, shortly after the couple returned from Lin’s hometown in Yichang city for Chinese New Year.

Minutes later, Lin’s phone rang. It was his girlfriend telling him she had been kidnapped.

‘Come and save me, my ex-husband has kidnapped me, come quickly. I think I’m on the highway already,’ she cried, before the line went dead.



Why Marya broke up with her baby daddy and her wedding plans

Popular artiste Marya has for the first time revealed the main reason why she broke up with her baby daddy Kevin Mutisya before reuniting.

The two started dating three years ago and last year, they were blessed with a son but in July this year, The Chokoza hitmaker took to social media to reveal that they were no longer an item. Her message read:


Marya’s ex-lover Colonel Mustafa was not happy and at a point, he wanted the singer back. But barely a week after the break-up, Marya and Kevin made up and they’re now together.

Colonel mustafa

In a Q&A session with her followers, Marya opened up about her personal life and one of her followers asked her why she broke up with her baby daddy, she said;


Marya and her lover are planning to walk down the aisle soon and she said;

During the initial stages of dating, Mike Sonko’s daughter Salma was not for their (Marya and Kevo) relationship and she accused the singer of stealing someone’s hubby. She came out to dispel allegations that she was a homewrecker and she said:


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