We all like to think our friends have good intentions for us all the time. This may however not be the case and here are some signs your friends are actually toxic for you.
1. They don’t support you. We all make terrible decisions sometimes, but that doesn’t mean your friends should stop supporting you through them — especially if you know it was wrong. Whether that means cheating on a partner, making a bad move at work, or bitching about one of your mutual friends, a real friend will support you and help you through it, not turn the other cheek.
2. They don’t make an effort with your new partner. Difference in personalities happen and it’s not uncommon for your friends not to get on with your S.O. for whatever reason — but if they actually valued your friendship, they should at least try.
3. They tease you about your insecurities. We all have insecurities (or if you don’t? YOU GO, GIRL) and tend to make fun of them as a defense mechanism, but that does not give your friends the right to tease you about things you’re not comfortable with. A joke is a joke; playing on your sensitive side is not.
4. Your parents don’t like them. Real talk: If you mom doesn’t like them, you probably shouldn’t either. What was it that Justin Bieber sang? Because he might not be a boy of much sense (most of the time, anyway), but he’s totally right about this one.
5. They’re not good at admitting when they’re wrong. We can all be stubborn and sometimes struggle to admit we’re wrong, but that doesn’t mean you should allow someone to put you down all the time — especially if they are obviously and morally in the wrong. Always be suspicious of someone who can’t apologize for their mistakes.
6. They make your other friends feel inadequate. If you’ve got friends in one group that make your friends in another group (whether school, college, work, etc.) feel bad because they “don’t know you as well” or “don’t see you as much,” this isn’t OK. They’re all your friends, so the chances are they’d get on well if they gave your other friends a chance.
7. They don’t respect your house. Friends that treat your house like their own is fine, providing they contribute to the endless pieces of toast they eat and actually tidy up the mess they inevitably create. If not? Get rid, yo.
8. They’re rude about things you like. It’s normal to have different tastes from your friends and to like different things, but that doesn’t mean to say they can openly and actively write off the things you care about — especially considering they should be the ones with your best interests at heart.
9. They’re aggressively competitive. And in turn make you feel weirdly embarrassed about sharing your achievements, namely because they always try to get one up on you and make you feel like you achieved little in comparison to them. This is probably not the case.
10. They tell people things about you that they shouldn’t. If you tell them something in confidence or share your secrets with them, only for them to tell their boyfriend because “they tell each other everything,” that is not OK. A friendship is just as special.
11. They make plans without you. They see other mutual friends behind your back and try to keep it a secret — only to accidentally let it slip and pretend to feel guilty about not inviting you.
12. They bring drama into your life. They’re the one that always cause beef at a birthday party, get too drunk on the night out, or accidentally-on-purpose end up matching with someone’s boyfriend on Tinder. If there’s something causing tension in your friendship group, you can rest assured they’re at the middle of it all.
13. They cancel plans with you last-minute. With no real rhyme or reason, they flake out on you at the last minute to make you feel inadequate or like they’re more important than you. Sometimes this might be great, but most of the time? It’s not.
14. They don’t make you happy anymore. Friends should be for fun times, having a laugh and emotional support — so if they’re not offering any of those things, even if they once did — then it’s probably time to get rid and make some new friends. A happy past doesn’t necessarily equal a great future, so don’t be afraid to wave good-bye if the negatives start to outweigh the positives.