Shockingly, This Is The Reason Most Men Fear Women Who Are Labeled As ‘Iron Ladies’

Situations, relationships and the current times have apparently created a ‘monster’ known as the ‘iron lady.’ This ambitious, hardworking, sexually liberated, allergic to lazy men and no-nonsense woman has left Kenyan men shaking in their boots.

With these qualities, these women have few suitors, mainly because no man wants a vocal, independent woman who will hold him accountable for his actions. Many men want a submissive, silent partner who says ‘yes’ to his every demand. They are required to settle for what the man is earning and surrender an opportunity to grow in the corporate world so as to feed her husband’s ego. Sorry to burst your bubble guys, but those days are long gone.

Related image

Women have become key components for the growth of any business. They have even gone as far as making it in male-dominated positions and careers. This unique species is feared by men so much so that other women believe that if they get a Masters degree or buy a swanky house or car, they are bound to remain single for the rest of their life.

READ; Living With An Infidel, Physically And Emotionally Battered – Do Women Have 9 Lives?

We have all heard of women who are single simply because their success scares men. Some, who are invested in a relationship prefer hiding their success in order to keep a man which brings me to ask; must women dull their shine so that men can be comfortable?

Related image

Well, ladies, men believe these so-called “iron ladies” make terrible wives. They apparently don’t take the time to nurture the family. This essentially means they do not attend to his every need. These women cannot be ‘tamed’ and that is the main reason men fear these women.

Image result for black woman changing car tyre

These women have no time to feed a man’s ego and this irritates men to the core. They will never need a guy to fix the bulb, pay debts, change a tyre or buy gifts for them mainly because they’ve got it covered. Money can buy almost anything these days right…

So take heart iron ladies, at least you now know why these men will disappear once they learn your power.

#my2cents

Living With An Infidel, Physically And Emotionally Battered – Do Women Have 9 Lives?

A huge percentage of women, if not all, have probably been with men who have either cheated on them, battered them, financially disabled them or ended up humiliating them beyond measure. So why will these women rise to see another day, put a smile on their faces, go about making their careers beautiful with all the heartache? Is it the pain that drives them or

So why will these women rise to see another day, put a smile on their faces, go about making their careers beautiful with all the heartache? Is it the pain that drives them or do they have 9 lives?

Image result for black women cheating

From time immemorial, women have been treated like disposable objects to men and mistreated. Their abilities not seen or appreciated.

Ladies, Here Are The Telling Signs He’s NOT Busy, You’re Just Irrelevant To Him

Their hearts are broken over and over again yet they go through the pain of bearing children, raising them on their own and still expected to have a career. Regardless, they end up letting their guard down when a man is involved. The question begs, why should they?

Related image

Men were meant to be the heads of the home, priests who guide the family and lead them to what is Godly. In this day in age, however, women have taken up this role while their men are busy entertaining younger women. Many are wallowing in filth as they disown the very people that loved them when all they had to offer was love.

And for what reason? “The sex is boring, she gained weight, she earns more than I do, it gets boring being with one woman, the other woman made me feel like a king,” are just some of the nonsensical reasons for their behaviour.

My response? If your wife for 10 years hadn’t nurtured your kingdom for that long, these shisha smoking, Guarana drinking, yolo confused youngsters would surely spit on your face!

But at the end of it all, I feel that women indeed have 9 lives. This is  quite enough space to take a man’s crap and turn it into something beautiful.

#My2cents

The Effects Of A Broken Heart – Devoted Couple Who Were Married For 75 Years Who Died Just Days Apart

A devoted couple who were married for 75 years have been buried side-by-side at the church where they wed – after one passed away within days of the other due to a “broken heart”.

Jim, 101 and Hilda Leach, 98, celebrated their diamond wedding anniversary on December 9th, 2016, marking 75 years since they tied the knot in World War Two.

Just days after their family party in Rushton Spencer, near Macclesfield, Cheshire, Jim passed away peacefully with Hilda by his side on December 17th at their home.

But their family said heartbroken Hilda did not want to be parted from her husband – and on January 2nd, she also passed away.

READ; Ladies, Here Are The Telling Signs He’s NOT Busy, You’re Just Irrelevant To Him

Now the couple – who had two daughters, five grandchildren, and four great-grandchildren – have been buried during a joint funeral at St Mary’s Church in Bosley, Cheshire.

The church is also the same spot where in the couple got married, just as Jim was heading off to fight in the war.

Daughter, Anne Brooker said: “They were together for 75 years and mum said there was nothing to live for after dad died.

“Dad had seen everyone at the anniversary and said his goodbyes and it was his time to go, and when dad went it was time for mum to go too.

“It was a shock when mum went so quickly after losing dad but they kept going for each other. It was really emotional saying goodbye to both of them at the funeral.

“They got married in that church, their coffins were together at the service and they were buried together. They were together right until the end.”

As World War Two broke out, he met trainee chiropodist Hilda by chance at a dance.

Instantly smitten, the couple were engaged for a year before Jim was conscripted into the Army in 1941 so they had a quick wedding.

 

Daughter Anne described both her parents as “determined”, explaining how her mum stunned doctors years ago by fighting back to full health after contracting polio and being told she would never walk again.

She explained: “Mum and dad were both very determined. They were a wonderful couple.

“Family and community were very important to both of them. We’ll miss them very much.”

 

 

mirror

Ladies, Here Are The Telling Signs He’s NOT Busy, You’re Just Irrelevant To Him

Really wanna give someone the ultimate insult? Call them irrelevant. It’s pretty much the worst thing you could be.

Irrelevant is the worst thing you could be because you’re so insignificant, no one even bothered to think of a more precise insult. Simply put, you don’t matter.

Needless to say, nobody wants to be called irrelevant. Especially not by the guy you like. That being said, whether we admit it to ourselves or not, there are times when you are, in fact, irrelevant to the guy you’re so obsessed with.

In fact, I would go so far as to say the reason you’re so obsessed with him is because you’re irrelevant to him. The problem is that instead of just accepting the fact that we don’t matter to him, we try to make up excuses as to why this guy’s not giving us the time of day.

“He’s not talking to me because he’s mad at me!” No, you’re not relevant enough for him to bother with being mad at you.

Ladies Please Note; EVERY Single One Of These 10 Things Is Emotional Abuse

“He’s not talking to me because he’s busy!” No, you’re not relevant enough for him to prioritize you over literally anything else.

“He’s not talking to me because he’s dead!” No, he just doesn’t want to waste another breath in his waking life conversing with you.

I get that it can be a little confusing. Maybe he is mad at you. Maybe he is busy! Maybe he is dead!

So, check out this list of surefire signs he’s not mad or busy or dead (or any other lame excuse you managed to come up with)… you’re just irrelevant to him

  • Your friends are sick of hearing about him, but his friends don’t even know who you are
  • None of his family members know who you are (that is if he even has a family because he’s never mentioned them).
  • He straight-up doesn’t respond to some of your texts.
  • You’ve never hooked up sober.
  • If you have hooked up sober, it was in the morning after a drunk hookup

Kenyan Women Share Their Hilarious Stories Buying The Morning After Pill

  • You guys have never shared a meal together.
  • If you have shared a meal together, it was either late-night pizza or hungover morning meals.
  • He Snapchats you more than he texts you.
  • You’ve never been on a real date with him.
  • If you have been on a date, it was one time. And it never happened again.
  • You’ve never spoken on the phone unless it was 4 am, and you needed him to buzz you up to his place.
  • He never wants to cuddle with you.
  • He chooses even the dumbest plans over you.
  • His friends (the same ones who don’t know who you are) always come before you.
  • You’ve told him a million personal things about you, and he can barely remember any of it.
  • He’s told you he’s “not looking for anything serious.”
  • He told you he was too busy to hang out, then posted a Snapchat story of himself alone on the couch.
  • Part of you is afraid that if you stopped putting in the effort, your relationship would completely fizzle out.

STOP WASTING YOUR TIME. You are cool, and fun and smart, and even though this guy can’t seem to appreciate that, I guarantee there’s someone out there who will.

Oh my! This is what men ALWAYS notice about you during sex

First off, the things we don’t notice: if your nails are chipping, your elbows are dry, or you have an ingrown hair somewhere along your bikini line. These are details that generally sail right past us. We’re more inclined to notice the big-picture behaviors that give us clues about whether we have serious chemistry. Are the sparks flying? Are we turning you on? Are you genuinely excited to be naked right now? These questions are important to men, and here’s what we look for to find answers;

Your Initiative

If we’re doing all the work and you’re just sort of hanging out to see what’s going to happen next, we’re going to think you’re not all that interested. So show a little excitement, eh? Take the lead in unbuckling or unclasping something. Roll us over, and get on top. Help us make this moment awesome.

The Way Your Body Moves

If you’re stiff, it puts a chill on the moment. We wonder if there’s a problem or if you’re feeling self-conscious. But if you’re revved up and sensual, that turns us on. We want to feel your body writhe against us. We want your chest to press against ours, to feel your thigh slide up between ours. The more you engage your entire body in the moment, the more we feel like you’re excited to be with us.

Your Eyes

Are you looking deeply into ours? Are you checking out our freshly naked bodies? Both options are good. What makes us uncomfortable is if you’re looking down (are you having doubts?), checking out your own body (feeling self-conscious?), or gazing off to the wall or ceiling (just bored?). So make sure your eyes aren’t telling us something you don’t want them to. Let us know you’re pumped to be here with us.

Your Breath

No, I’m not talking about whether it stinks (although—let’s hope it doesn’t!). I’m talking about how it sounds. Is it heavier than usual? Similarly, is your voice deeper? These clues tell us whether you’re genuinely aroused. You don’t need to play it up by panting like you just ran a 5 km or trying to mimic the deeper notes on an organ. But if you’re getting into it, let it show. Let us feel your breath against our neck, whisper something sexy into our ear, let us know you can’t wait for what’s about to happen. Our arousal feeds off of yours, so don’t be afraid to be visibly turned on.

If You’re Freshly Waxed or Wearing Expensive Lingerie

Hey—no judgment if you’re not. But the prep work implies that you were thinking about sex, and we’re all for that. After all, so were we. Glad we’re on the same page here!

pulse.ng

Guys, could this be the least harsh and probably sweetest way to get your girl to lose weight?

Some men can be so harsh when telling their girlfriends to lose weight. Treating her to good food and smothering her then later blantly telling her she’s fat isn’t the way to go. Remember, aside from her gorgeous body, you loved her for her awesome personality and that hasn’t changed. The gentleman below felt that the only way to get his stubborn girlfriend exercising is making it romantic through dancing, while cooking all her meals in a healthy way to get the results he wanted without her knowledge. He took to social media to pour his guilt. Frankly, I like this guy;

Image result for black man at the gym

“My girlfriend and I have been dating for over a year plus and she stays over sometimes. I’m one who likes to gym and keep fit. So she sees this as a nice thing, and to be honest, I think it turns her on to see my body and all of that, coz wen am back from the gym and I shower, she begins to act very sweet and the rest is usually censored. The only problem is that she wud never join me when I ask her to, even when I tell her she can just do it for the benefits. Don’t get me wrong, I like my lady’s body, but what do I do when she’s constantly eating unhealthy?

I recently came across this health and weight loss tea. I am actually not a big on any weight loss tea coz i believe that the right way is to exercise and cut down fatty foods. I agreed to use this tea because it helps achieve my beliefs.
I did my research and found that this brand seemed sincere. So, since my babe now almost lives with me, and naturally eats with me, I just add this tea (with edible content) into almost everything I cook for her. I make her tea with it, put it in our noodles and other meals that I prepare. When she asks why the food is green, I lie that it’s a special recipe and because she loves me, she doesn’t bother.

Image result for black couple doing zumba in the house

For exercise, I make sure that we dance anytime she’s around because she loves dancing. She thinks its romantic that I dance with her every now and then but she doesn’t know that I am just getting her to exercise. She’s been losing some pounds and says she feels lighter for some reason she does not know. She used to have hormonal imbalance and problems with menstruation but all that is gone now. She says she sleeps better and is more active and energetic.
Please help me so I can know how best to tell my lady that my secret tea is the reason for all her recent joy without hurting her feelings.”

Ladies, If You MUST Know, Here Are 5 Signs To Tell If A Man Is A Virgin

It is very unfortunate you can’t determine a man’s virginity through intercourse.

The best way to be certain if your Mr. Right is virgin is to ask him outright whether he has had sexual encounters in the past.

As usual there are signs that easy give a man out if he is truly a virgin. However, if you feel too shy to ask him, read this article for clues…

Ask him politely

In men, there are no physical indicators to determine their virginity. This is unlike women where a hymen breaks during sexual intercourse and normally leaves a little bit of blood.

Find the right time and ask your man politely. Since relationships must not be built on lies, he will hopefully openly tell you everything.

Physical relationship with women

A man who is a virgin can be differentiated from a man who engages in sexual escapades by monitoring his relationship with women. A man who is particularly shy around women and is reluctant to touch them in any way is most likely a virgin.

You might notice that, when you or another woman goes to hug or touch him, he becomes agitated and awkward, without quite knowing what to do with his hands.

Test the waters

If you are so eager to know his sexual status, plan a date night and take things to the bedroom.

Most guys will accept your honest invitation and give you the best sex of your life but virgins will quickly whisk away even before you start foreplay. He will be very shy, unable to speak and not daring to look at you.

These signs might simply be inexperienced lovers who still haven’t overcome the jitters when getting intimate with a woman, as opposed to complete virgins.

Quick orgasm

Men who are having sex for the first times are desensitized to their arousal and can’t control themselves to last longer in bed. In worst cases, they might not reach orgasm or have difficulty climaxing because of anxiety.

They are nervous; always thinking about how they are performing in bed.

Clueless during love making

Having sex with a virgin can be the worst day of your life. How?

He begins by touching you clumsily and quickly, without really knowing what he should do and where he should touch. Moving their hands all over your body quickly and in a frenzied manner clearly shows they are virgins.

pulse.ng

Girls, what would you do if your man says this about your hygiene?

Ladies, I get it, when in a relationship, your comfort zone is disrupted; You now need to shave or wax, do your nails and hair constantly, be neat and most of all, take baths, not just one. This young man took to social media complaining about his girlfriend’s poor hygiene, and it wasn’t pretty.

Read on;

Image result for a bad smell

“I don’t know if I should call my girlfriend dirty. My girl is so porsh and hot, all her pictures on point and her dress sense is killing but I think she is dirty. My girlfriend goes to use the toilet but will never flush it very well, you must come and see stains of poo on the toilet sit and I will use my hands to wash it. First I felt it was a mistake until this kept repeating its self, I also noticed that each time I want to give her a head her butt smells poo poo and I just use my hands to cover my nose. I don’t know if she does not wipe her ass well or what . Sometimes when I want to help her throw her dress in the washing machine, I see stains of poo on her under wear and I get very irritated. This is a girl that will always remind me to wash my hands and have my bath before I touch her. Sometimes she will bluntly tell me that my breath stinks I should brush. Now how do I tell her about this without making her feel bad? I can’t stand this in marriage and our sex life has dropped because of this.she always say I can’t give head but how will I when all I smell is poo. Bom post please, I hope she does not find out this post is actually for her.”

Here are 5 early signs you’ll see in a needy guy

Being in a relationship means you are entitled to a certain level of attention from your sweetheart.

However, there is a difference between neediness and having normal, healthy relationship needs.

Here are the signs to know if you’re in a relationship with such a man, who doesn’t understand the concept of giving you any space at all.

He has no friends

One of the early signs you will see in a clingy guy is that he either has no friends, or shows no sign of being willing to hang out with no one but you.

You should be worried because soon enough, it will no longer be fun when he has no one else to spend time with but you.
He tracks you all the time

It is cute and romantic when a guy checks on you during the day to know where you are and how your day is going.

If, on the other hand your guy calls you over and over again, all in the name of being caring, or panics and thinks you’re gone cheating only because you missed two calls, that’s a sign that he could be a needy guy.

Requires validation all the time

Another sign of a needy, clingy guy is that he often wants validation.

He constantly asks you to tell him how much you love him, and that you will never leave him.

This could be cute, really, but when it becomes a regular habit, it ceases to be an endearing act.

It is a sign of neediness.

Asking for social media PDA

If he specifically asks all the time that you put his pictures on your social media pages, just because he needs everyone to know that you are a couple, that could be a subtle sign of neediness.

Emotional blackmail

If a guy ever asks you to pick between him and your career or your friends, that is a certain sign of being really needy.

pulse.ng

Trouble in paradise? You can now get a divorce through a phone app

It can feel like 21st century life is completely controlled by our phones.

We use them to work out when to go to sleep, what to buy, where to go on holiday, what to eat.

There’s very little you can’t do with an app.

And now we can add getting a divorce to that list, because someone’s just developed an app which will help you terminate your marriage.

Image result for black couple getting a divorce

Amicable claims to be a ‘faster, fairer, fixed-price way to separate’, which helps users make arrangements for their children, split their finances fairly and deal with paperwork.

The app offers arbitration, a divorce coach and lots of practical advice to help people reach a fairer divorce faster, to simplify the process and reduce their costs.

‘Our aim is to create a dialogue between parting couples so they can, for example, successfully co-parent children after a split and not make an enemy of their ex,’ they say on their website.

‘We want to help all couples stay amicable throughout their divorce or separation.’

The key thing is that the app claims to offer a cheaper divorce services than most traditional outlets.

Image result for divorce

‘Amicable’s aim is to give you options to sort things out starting with the cheapest way of doing things,’ they explain.

The actual app is free and is designed so that you could use it to do your divorce yourself.

‘Our divorce coach service gives you some extra help to make agreements and help with all the legal paperwork.

They also offer free divorce advice, as well as running a blog which has lots of first-hand pieces from couples and parents who have gone through the process.

The question now is: whens the first app wedding occurring?

 

metro.co.uk

How cute! Julie Gichuru’s daughter pens down a list to convince her why she should allow her to sleepover at her friend’s home

Should you as a parent allow your young one to go for sleepovers? Or better yet at what age should you allow your child to sleepover at a friends house? These are some of the challenges parents face as their kids grow.

Former TV Presenter Julie Gichuru has a great career that keeps her on her toes, being the host of Africa Leadership Dialogues, she’s also a business-woman running a clothing line. Julie also wears many other hats; she is a philanhropist, a wife and a mother to not one, not two, but four kids.

Related image

Taking care of this number of kids is not for the faint-hearted. The sleepless nights when she experienced four rounds of cholic, changing diapers and breastfeeding, gives her the right to say NO to almost everything. Or so I think.

Image result for julie gichuru kids

It seems her daughter, who is all grown up now, took it upon herself to convince her mother why she should be allowed to go for sleepovers, which was quite cute, I bet Julie couldn’t say NO after reading it.

Here’s a letter that Julie Gichuru’s daughter wrote to convince her mum to allow her sleepover at a friends house.

Check out the reasons why Julie should allow her daughter to go for sleepovers more;

 

Man uses prayer to threaten girlfriend that lightning will strike her if she cheats

Men will sometimes use all manner of techniques to ensure they drive home their point. Their pride will never allow them to watch a woman cheat and for that, they will resort to pulling all sorts of stunts, like this 40-year-old man who prays ‘threats’ to pass across the point. His girlfriend took to social media to express her irritation with his behavior.

Ladies, is this normal?

Image result for black woman irritated

 

“My man friend is a prayer worrier and it is getting out of hand. He is too childish with his prayers because instead of him to express himself he will be using prayers to talk to you in a lousy way.
Example.
Aba father if my girlfriend cheats kill her with thunder .
Abba father show me her movement
Abba father her body is my temple
Abba father I don’t have sliver or gold but keep her with me.
Abba father abba father am always his prayer point and he prays it very very loud so I can hear.
To crown it all he is jobless but working in the church as an instrumentalist.
I love him, but he is beginning to irritate me. Am 39 years and he is 42 years, my friends say he is already a fool at 40 that I should leave him alone. What do you all think. Help me I don’t want it to seem like I left him cause of money.”

These are the most notable power couples in Kenya so far

Kenya is a vibrant nation. Despite being segmented into social classes, there are power couples who influence Kenyans to be united.

These couples have shaped the country in their own ways including in health, entertainment and politics.

Check out the list of influential couples in Kenya below:

Uhuru and Margaret Kenyatta

Image result for margaret kenyatta and uhuru kenyatta

President Uhuru Kenyatta has transformed several sectors in the country through his Jubilee manifesto while his wife, First Lady Margaret, has made strides in ending mother and child deaths with her Beyond Zero campaigns.

William and Rachel Ruto

Image result for william and rachel ruto

Deputy President William Ruto has been active in Kenyan politics since his university days and is referred to in political circles as a kingmaker.

His wife, Rachel, through the Joyful Women Organization, has been able to spur a table banking initiative throughout Kenya and is aiming to spread it to the rest of Africa.

Bob and Wambui Collymore

Image result for bob and wambui collymore

By virtue of being the CEO of Safaricom, one of the biggest telecom companies in Kenya, Bob makes it to the list.

His position gives him a foothold in shaping communication policies among the common wananchi.

Joseph and Tabitha Karanja

Image result for joseph and tabitha karanja

Chairman and CEO of Keroche breweries respectively. They teamed up to venture into the liquor making business with only Ksh 100,000. Now they are one of the most recognized brands, tapping into billions and scooping numerous prestigious awards.

Alfred Mutua and Lilian Nganga

Image result for alfred mutua lilian nganga

Machakos Governor Alfred Mutua and his second wife, Lilian are on the list on account of Mutua’s political activities.

He is known to be a politician who keeps his word to his electorate and is quick at implementing development projects.

His wife is always at his side, spearheading Cancer awareness among other projects in the county level.

Ladies, would you tell your girlfriend if you found out her husband was cheating?

The notion goes like; “Women are their own worst enemies,” but in this case, what would you advice a lady to do? Her friend’s marriage seems to be working, everything is okay until you are cursed with the revelation that her husband is cheating. You don’t want to lose her as a friend, you also don’t want to hide news that could potentially save her life. So, what do you do? This remains a controversial topic thus the lady below took to social media in need of advice. Read on;

Image result for black girls arguing

“I and my husband have been married for two years after dating for five years, so practically we have been together for seven years, ever since I knew my husband, he has one close friend,his paddy from the university, they are so close, if not inseparable. His friend has also been married for a year, I and his wife got to become friends, not so close though but we relate well as we are almost, if not age mates. She’s a nice warm person. Recently I got to find out that her husband is cheating on her with an older woman, the fact is that he is emotionally attached to the lady. I got to know through a chat he had with my husband on whatsapp. Right now he’s having a little rift with my husband because he told him to stop. Telling his wife is out of the question because I can’t even bring myself to say it, she might not believe me. And I don’t want to be a bearer of bad news. Maybe am being too emotional about it. Please advise me on how to let go of this? “

People reveal the moment they realised their former partner was simply ‘awful’

Breaking up is never an easy to do.

But for some, it’s the best thing they could have ever done.

People took to Whisper to reveal what made them realise their exes were ‘awful’ people after the relationship ended.

Some discovered their former partner held controversial views on politics and medicine, while others watched their exes go off the rails.

Image result for black couple breaking up

One user confessed their ex had suffered a breakdown shortly after their split, forcing them to fear for their life.

‘My ex went crazy two weeks after we broke up,’ they wrote.

‘Literally. Dodged a bullet.’

Image result for black couple breaking up

Another user revealed their ex-girlfriend believed vaccines were ‘unnatural’ and would never consent to her future children receiving them.

The author also noted his ex had never been vaccinated herself, leaving them even more relieved the pair had parted ways.

For one person, remembering the bad times became a good way to move forward.

Others found discovering their ex’s faults after the relationship ended often left them feeling righteous and better off.

Some contributors revealed their exes had become involved in drugs – either taking them themselves or giving them to others.

‘My ex got arrested for drugging girls at parties,’ one person wrote, noting they had definitely dodged a bullet by ending the relationship.

Another, who is now married and expecting their first child, said their ex is now using meth, while one person was told by their ex they had found a more cost efficient way to get a buzz.

‘I ran into my ex, who casually mentioned he was high on Windex,’ they wrote.

‘Glad I ended that relationship.’

dailymail

Twitter goes wild over the notion that single women in their thirties are bitter

Today’s conversation by Maina Kageni and Mwalimu Kin’ang’i caused quite the stir on twitter, when both guys and girls gave their opinions on the controversial topic that single women in their thirties, even with their great careers, awesome houses and cars, remain a bitter lot. Check out some of the tweets;

 

Mum escapes domestic violence – defies odds to rebuild life with kids in amazing way

A woman and her kids built a big house from scratch to escape domestic violence by following YouTube tutorials.

Single mum Cara Brookins, from Bryant in Arkansas, worked with her kids Roman, Jada, Hope, and Drew to plan and construct the five-bedroom property, which they named Inkwell Manor.

Cara, a senior computer analyst and author, told BuzzFeed that it was back in 2007 when she came up with the plan.

She was driving home after a weekend away when she spotted a tornado-hit house reduced to rubble. The scene inspired her to pick up some tools and do some family DIY.

“It made me think, ‘what if we bought some 2x4s and sheet rock and put that together?'” she said.

“What would our dream house be? Would we want to build it?”

Cara’s children were 17, 15, 11, and 2 back when they began building their dream home together. And it was as much about rebuilding their lives as it was a house.

The mum was worried her kids would have “no self-esteem and no confidence.”

She herself had suffered abusive relationships in her 20s and 30s and has twice been divorced.

“The reality is when you’re facing that level of terror, you’re all just in survivor mode,” she told BuzzFeed .

“Each one of you is just trying to make it through the day. I worried that if they left home I’d never see them again.”

So Cara built her own family sanctuary. Somewhere she and her children could start again in safety. She bought the tools, the materials, and followed online ‘how-to’ guides, even laying the foundations, erecting the wooden house frame, and tiling the floors. It took a long while – but they got there.

“We were exceptionally naive, but sometimes ignorance takes the place of courage,” she said.

“As we were trying to do this, we were also learning how to communicate.”

The family have been living in Inkwell Manor for eight years. Cara said her kids did benefit from the experience, and that they’re “fearless,” ready to “dive into anything.”

Cara and her family’s journey is fully documented in her new book, Rise, which comes out on January 24.

 

 

mirror

Man killed as lover sets house ablaze in Eldoret

A man was killed after his lover doused their house with petrol and set it ablaze at Shauri estate in Eldoret.

The middle aged jua kali artisan was burnt beyond recognition and residents said the two had been having domestic squabbles.

Police are looking for the woman who escaped after the incident. She poured petrol in the house as the man was asleep.

The man’s daughter Mary Njagi claimed that the attacker had been their maid.