Read about these habits that we mistake as healthy but are actually dangerous patterns we develop in our relationships.
1. Keeping score of who’s doing what
Some spouses find petty ways of upsetting their partner to justify complaining about the others behaviour.
Because it shows that you two are not comfortable communicating openly and clearly with one another. A person has no reason to be passive-aggressive if they feel safe expressing any anger or insecurity within the relationship. A person will never feel a need to drop “hints” if they feel like they won’t be judged or criticized for it.
2. Holding the relationship hostage
Blackmailing your partner to stay in a relationship is pretty common behaviour that people don’t think alot about. When one person complains and blackmails the other person by threatening the commitment of the relationship, that is a problem.
It’s emotional blackmail that brings about alot of unnecessary drama. Any small challenge in the relationship is used as an opportunity to tell the other person they are not committed. This ‘crisis’ results from negative thoughts and feelings that are not being communicated to each other, and so make it out to be a threat to the relationship.
3. Blaming your partner for your own negative emotions
Let’s say you’re having a bad day most probably from work related stress, and your partner isn’t exactly being sympathetic or supportive at the moment. Yet you want them to pay attention to you.
So you lash out at them for being what you call insensitive.
4. Displaying a loving jealousy
When your spouse or partner gets mad when you talk, touche, call, text, hang out, with others and then takes the anger out on you, and attempt to control their behavior. This often leads to taking extreme action like hacking into your partner’s email account, looking through text messages while they’re in the shower or even following them around town and showing up unannounced when they’re not expecting you.